Another Step

Timing

2011-02-23T09:22:00.000-08:00

I have my Knitting Blog that is currently active and God has blessed my life with much more then I've had in the past. I need to focus on the right things and as much as I want to keep writing on this blog I am going to make the decision to pause this blog. I will keep up on my Knitting Blog and I will be helping F design a new business website (not updated yet, but in progress) that I will be updating and posting on. Also, FB has been a great place for me to write my encouraging ideas and post somethings that are important to me during the week.

New Year :)

2011-01-05T08:32:00.000-08:00

New Years always makes people try and "start over" or "start again" in many areas of their lives. I was reading a book on financial freedom and the author talked about how everyone tries to make goals and he would prefer that we call them "targets." If I shoot for a target and miss then I keep practicing until I hit it. A goal makes most think of something in sports ... and if you miss a goal there you really can't make it up too often. (I suppose that analogy has some wholes, but honestly ... you get my point right?)

All that to say? Francisco and I started our New Years cleanse and also decided to start working out to Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred dvd. I got it for $9 so I figured it was worth it. I had heard and seen a few of my friends have great success doing this dvd, so after reading more reviews and watching a few clips on youtube I bought it! Because Francisco works 40/week I decided to yield to his schedule, so that we can be more successful. He sacrifices a lot for us already I thought I could return the favor. We decided that we would get up at 5am M-F (Probably later Sat. & Sun.) and work out for 30min. That's 7 days a week folks. PLUS we're still going to classes at ERWMA. We'll be working out like this until the end of January when we'll be headed off to Cannon Beach for a 4 day Anniversary celebration! Then when we get back I think we'll have somewhere around 7 days left over! :)
On the dvd there are 3 levels. I'm thinking we could potentially do this for 3 months. Each month we would stay on one level. On day 3 I'm thinking this, but by day 14 I may be wanting to kick it into level 2.
I'm excited about the results! And I'm excited that we're consistently exercising again! Yahoo!

Knitting Site!

2010-12-29T13:36:00.000-08:00

My husband made me a new website for sharing my knitting obsession! I wanted to share it with you :) It's still really new so it doesn't have a lot of content, but keep checking back!
Knit Again

Something to Write About: Want To Win Some Book $$$?

2010-12-17T08:48:00.000-08:00

My sister is having a contest! You should go find out about how to get an early Christmas present!!

Something to Write About: Want To Win Some Book $$$?: "As this is the final month of my Genre Series, I wanted to send it off in style by giving out prizes!! Yeah! Prizes! I also thought it would..."

Dear Friends...

2010-11-11T08:19:00.000-08:00

Just another one of those posts...I've posted these before, but it's still something I can't stop thinking about right now. I am totally and completely aware that life changes and it's beyond my control. And that if life didn't change then I wouldn't be a better version of me...that it wouldn't be life really. I still struggle deep within my soul with the breaking and separating of my friendships over the years. I am fully aware that this is normal and that it is supposed to happen, in a way. But that doesn't make my heart ache when I recall so many amazing memories I've collected over the years from so many amazing people. I think it would exhaust me if I got the chance to try and be friends with everyone on the level I desire. I suppose this desire to be in relationship is designed into me by my Creator and ultimately the desire should be pointed towards Him.
I still miss you. I miss my friends in middle school...in particular those in Mr. Taylor's class! I don't know why I remember this class so well. Of course I can't forget band and Mr. Kenny!
I miss my friends in high school. Although high school was probably the hardest 4 years of my life so far...I miss the people that were my friends. I wish I could show them who I really am today, because I fear that I gave them a shadow of who I really am....a discredit to the friendship they gave me. More then just my peers I wish I could run back to all those teachers that touched my life and left lasting imprints on me that I could not and would not ever want to erase.
I think, as is life, my broken college relationships hurt just a bit more than most. Both schools, Corban and North Central held many dear close friends who helped shape who I am today. Some I am connected to on Facebook and others I have lost connections completely and pray I can thank you when I get to heaven. It's difficult for me to try and even find the right words. They all seem vague to me. I am upset that it's so challenging for me to keep relationships going at the level I want them to be...but I have to have a bit of grace for myself. It does take 2 people to have a relationship on any level. I don't ever want to carry resentment for the way things turned out, but I still miss you. I miss your hugs and your words and our laughter. I miss the impact you've had on me. I miss forming memories. I am grateful that those of you I have contact with right now seem to be living the life you dreamed! None of you will know just how much you mean to me.
And to those I can't seem to find to reconnect with ... I miss you. And I'm praying for you. I wish to some day come across your smiling familiar face and give you a hug and tell you just how much I appreciated you in my life.
Know how much ALL of my friends mean to me no matter what I do or don't do. Know that ALL of you make an impression on my heart and I will carry you around with me for the rest of my life.

Just a couple updates :)

2010-10-02T18:20:00.000-07:00

Made some more progress on a project at my knitting group on Friday! This pattern knit quick! I've been making sure to regulate my knitting times, but surprised myself when this one was done!
The second picture is of a quick cowl I made Francisco a while back for when it gets cold in the mornings (he rides his bike). But I just now got a picture of it!

Pattern On Ravelry!

Project Done

2010-09-07T18:08:00.000-07:00

I knitted a LOT this weekend! I finished this!


It's for a friend!

It took me WAY too long to finish this, but I did have to frog it once (UGH). I finally got it done and it's incredible! It's sooo soft and really long. I know she'll love it!
I also frogged and re-did my shawl/lace wrap I've been trying to work on. That one isn't mindless, so it's more challenging to find time to work on it. I did make a tiny oopsie already, but it's ok I won't frog it again! I am very much enjoying working on it! And I bought the yarn I'll be using for my first sweater!! :D I'll post more when I can figure out how to take better pictures. Blah!

Francisco's Gold belt Test!

2010-09-02T21:09:00.000-07:00

Cute!

2010-08-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

http://www.etsy.com/shop/LovieAndBoo?ref=seller_info

Cute stuff at this etsy site :) My friend posted it on her blog and I thought I'd share!

Baby Blankets

2010-08-11T12:27:00.000-07:00

Baby Boy Blanket #2


Baby Girl Blanket #1


Baby Girl Blanket #1

Well I finally got the pictures posted.
And both mama's loved the blankets! Machine washable cotton blends too! So that means the babies can now poop and spit up all they want on their new blankies lol! I'm not sure this is my favorite pattern as far as "prettiness" goes, but it sure is simple and nice to have for a "useful" blanket. I think I might try and figure out how to make them bigger so that the mom's can use them longer. Not sure :) Still knitting and working on some fun projects.
New goals? Trying to finish what I already have on my needles, so I don't get so backed up!

how do you say 3?

2010-08-02T20:55:00.001-07:00

God is good at humbling me. I still need guidance ... good thing I don't run this universe. OYIE!

part deux

2010-08-02T18:25:00.000-07:00

Worst run recorded thus far on my Nike+ .... mentally and physically felt like a giant KNOT. Don't like running at 5pm...also I do NOT think it's ok to have to run BEHIND my antithesis. God please bless that woman....but today was NOT the day to see her.
How am I supposed to be broken and stay broken for God and yet still function ... when I believe I can only function by being my version of whole and complete??? How am I supposed to function when the whole world seems to be showing me how fragmented and behind I really am! I get that those aren't the truth ... in my head ... if you asked me that's the answer I'd give you because it's the "right" one. I just want to live by the truths ... OH Father help me please!!

Performing

2010-08-02T09:17:00.000-07:00

I wonder where in my life this idea of needing perform everything perfectly came from. I've been in a state of frustrated awe for a week or so now trying to contemplate why I do this! I realize that my life is a gift from God and I chose to receive the gift of His salvation. It should stand that I would live freely in that gift. To do the best with what I'm given. But when and where have I crossed the line of "doing the best with what I'm given" to "never thinking I'm doing my best." I asked my husband about this and it even seemed to baffle him. He could not explain what seems like such a fine line to walk. How do I become okay with who I am and where I am without losing my drive to be better and seek after the Lord more? When will I stop trying to do "good enough" to get what I want? Because frankly, I will never be good enough for myself and I will most certainly NOT be good enough for everyone around me. I know this and yet it seems I am addicted to chasing down the next compliment...the next "good enough" momentary high. I don't want to just stop chasing down a better me either. Am I also addicted to a better me because I never think I"m good enough? This idea that I can do enough in my life to get the blessings and dreams God has for me ... is ABSURD! And yet I chase it. Thinking I have to work my way. Of course I fully believe in grace and mercy....or do I? Because if I fully believed ... would I really be chasing? I feel tugged and called to by the Holy Spirit inside my soul ... loving me where I'm at. I can feel His call to me ... to just "be ok" with who He made me. But who is that? Because I'm far beyond the person I used to be, so I want ... yearn to be far beyond the person I am currently. Isn't that our life? Isn't that the race we're running? Or is it. What is the race? And am I in the wrong one? Are these even the right questions to be asking?
These thoughts are plaguing me ... because they seem to not have answers and yet I feel glad that I'm dealing with this now...before I'm 30. I suppose I could guess that most don't. Of course then again that's comparing. So I'm trying to make myself feel better by saying "well yes I'm struggling with this path of wrong thinking and living, BUT at least it's now and not later." Again I find myself trapped inside a circular path of a performance based life.
Husband says that he struggles with this ... at work. I tried to isolate where I struggle with this and realized this morning that a new week doesn't signify endless possibilities...it suddenly signifies endless areas I need to "work on." Of course that's not every morning and I can choose NOT to think like that. And I think that's part of it, but this overwhelming need to get up out of bed and be "on" is NOT how I'm supposed to be living my life. To get up in the morning and beg God to help me when I haven't even been awake for 5minutes of the morning. What kind of a life is this!? I know I'm better then this ... or am I? Is that, too, performance based? Something I should be "doing" better? And WHY am I hardwired to this? Are we all?? Or am I truly addicted to trying to do it all alone? This screams lack of faith and trust in God. Then that begs the question why NOT trust the creator of the universe!! I mean if He can knit the world and universe together so well ... why wouldn't He do the same for me and my life.
Is this the reason why I hate the process...the journey? Because to me the journey screams not of progress or grace or mercy but of thousands upon thousands of failings and areas that I should work on to be better at. Wow ... not a life to live and not really something I like to say about myself. It sounds so wrong, so the way I used to think. Knowledge is power right? Now that I 'know' does this mean I will begin to give in and allow God to take over the rest of me? I pray that. I really don't want this to be the rest of my life.
And OH what freedom awaits me! To truly let go and allow God to just pour over me and through me. Is this the breaking apart I asked for? Another moment in my journey where He breaks me even more to mold me into Him. To make my heart and my desires more like His? I want this! And yet ... to reveal these new pains and cracks seem almost too overwhelming and painful. I wish to have the eyes of Christ. To see myself so broken down as a wondrous gift to others around me. Because only broken can I pour out the full love and mercy of Christ onto everyone I meet. I do not want to be in His way...and yet as I run around trying to perform everything 'good enough' without Him I believe I am in the way.
I do know this .. my salvation is secure. There is nothing that can pluck me from hand of Christ. AND nothing more I can do for my salvation. I trust Christ as my savior ... only one way to the Father ... when will the rest of my life follow this?

So what I needed to read :) as always!

2010-06-07T10:27:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, AdvoCare's President and CEO, Richard Wright, left a message on his Facebook page that, if everyone who read it would do as he suggested, would elevate AdvoCare's phenomenal growth even beyond where it is. The good news is that anyone who is reading this can do exactly what he stated, and that was, "Let's everyone step it up a notch." You see, that's exactly what life and business and progress in life at the individual level is all about "stepping it up a notch," and doing more than we've done and doing more than we're currently doing. Here's an analogy on that subject for you to consider; when the space shuttle is sitting on the launch pad, with seven or eight astronauts inside, and when the countdown reaches "3, 2, 1 - and we have ignition," the main engines ignite with the fierce fury of an exploding volcano. In an instant, the shuttle with all of its main engines, fuel tanks, booster rockets and other major component parts begin functioning in harmony to do one primary thing - to steadily increase in speed up to 17,500 miles per hour in order to overcome the pull of the earth's gravity. If for any reason whatever, the main engines were to fail or lose their full thrust, the effect of gravity would overcome the upward momentum and disaster would follow. And, when finally the shuttle system reaches 17,500 miles per hour in momentum, that speed is sufficient to have placed the shuttle into orbit around earth - usually at an altitude of about 200 miles, or about 1,056,000 feet (the most modern commercial jet usually cruises along at about 550 miles per hour at an altitude of about 38,000 feet). Now, I suggest today that there?s a dramatic comparison between what I've just described regarding the launching of the space shuttle, and the "launching" of our personal life into a new and higher orbit of enjoyment, financial independence, and peace of mind. And, from wherever we may be in life, if we will respond to Richard's appeal to "step it up a notch," we can do just that. For you and I and everyone else, the quality of our existence on this planet is determined not so much by luck, but by the power and the determination of what we choose to do, what we choose to believe, and what we choose to think. What we do and what we think and believe represent our own internal "rocket boosters" that can enable us to overcome the "pull of gravity" represented by all the obstacles, setbacks, failures, disappointments, self-imposed limitations and destructive and limiting habits we've created within ourselves. This "what I choose to do and think" is our own onboard propulsion system (in the form of our dreams, desires and ambition) that, if we push the throttle full forward, can allow us to escape our own internal "pull of gravity" that tends to hold us back and keep us where we are. But some people are reluctant to do that, because by increasing our thrust ? or momentum ? our lives can quirk and shake and vibrate, and all that turbulence can make us nervous and uncomfortable. For many people, they find contentment, safety and security merely by climbing into their shuttle cabin (their job and their circumstances), strapping themselves in, and then they sit there and pretend to be going into space; they play the "make believe" game of what it would be like to hear the engines and feel the power of massive upward momentum. You can pretend, or you can "let the rockets roar" and thrust yourself forward as never before. And finally, once you've made it to orbit at 17,500 miles per hour, by "stepping it up a notch," you can increase your speed to 22,500 miles per hour and fully overcome gravity and go into space to explore all that God has created. - Ron Reynolds

Mental Food :)

2010-05-26T10:35:00.000-07:00

Mental Vitamin - The Wrong Forest

from AdvoCare's Facebook Notes by AdvoCare & Ron Reynolds

A man left his home with a ladder and walked for several miles toward a dense, wooded area where he thought he remembered having built a tree house when he was a young boy. He maneuvered his ladder through the thicket to what he thought was the right tree, and propped the ladder against the tree and climbed to the top. It was then, as he could see more of where he really was, that he discovered that not only was this the wrong tree, but he was in the wrong forest. Something similar happens to lots of people; we don't carry a big ladder all the way to a distant forest only to discover we've gone to the wrong place, but many do wake up one morning, and discover that we've chosen the wrong occupation. That can be a horrifying discovery - to conclude that what we chose to do many years ago hasn't turned out to be as rewarding, as exciting, and as fulfilling as we thought it would be. There was a moment in my life when I felt trapped in a job that simply was not feeding my spirit, and it wasn't enabling me to earn enough to keep up with ever-increasing expenses. There is such a thing as being able to "see the future in advance," and at age thirty-two, with my future moving in upon me. I was weary of being told when I could take a vacation, when I could eat lunch, when to take a break, when I had to arrive at work, when I could go home, when - or if - I would get a raise, and who I was to take orders from. It seemed to me to be a form of enslavement, and I knew it was time to change. On impulse one day, I wrote a letter of resignation and then went home to tell my wife. Good fortune smiled upon me and I found a new position at another company doing very much the same thing, although the pay was much better. I still didn't know what I wanted to do, but I did know what I didn't want to do anymore, and once again luck visited me and I went to a meeting involving a "business opportunity" and after one year, became a full-time distributor. That led me to do what I do today, and my life has surely been blessed. Through this whole process, I was at least smart enough to "follow the still, small voice." I knew what I did not want to do anymore, and I simply kept listening to a subtle, persuasive and whispering voice that seemed to be guiding me to make some crucial decisions. I often wonder about those who keep doing "what they don't want to do" as I had for about a dozen years. If you are one who feels captured by your circumstances as I was, I would offer a reminder; a job is where you work just hard enough to keep getting fired and the boss pays you just enough to keep you from quitting. That is not a way to live, and there are other choices that can lead to better - and sometimes challenging - changes, if you will make some serious choices. Or, you can stay and do what circumstance forces you to do. We all must make our own decisions about what's best for us and for our family, but for me, I have a strong conviction; we can limit our dreams so they conform to the level of our income, or we can find something that can expand our income to the level of our dreams and then commit ourselves to its attainment. We call such an approach "taking more control over the quality of your own life." My conclusion is simple; it's easy for us to find ourselves with the ladder of our life up against what we thought was the correct tree only to find that we're in the wrong forest. And, if you think the pain of change is too difficult, try the pain of not changing.

Oh my!

2010-05-17T09:40:00.000-07:00

Out of curiosity I went back to the beginning of my blog. I have a new friend (hi friend!!) who is lurking on my blog and I asked her if she was reading it. This morning she informed me she was reading/skimming the whole thing. Honestly I'm slightly embarrassed. I just went back to see what my blog was about in August of 2005. All I have to say is, OH MY! I have changed A LOT! And what I write about has changed. I think I muse more now on my blog (among other things). It's odd to think that this August will mark 5 years of having a blog. That's a long time.
As I was reading what I had written all those years back I'm struck with the thought that I didn't add much to the world. LOL! Oh well :) nothing I can do about that now.
But seriously though...at 24 I thought I was more mature then it seems I actually was. Are we always less mature then we seem to think we are at the current age we're in?
I am even MORE grateful for the continued friendships and family relationships that I've kept over these years of my life. Thank you for loving me through the junk!

Distractions

2010-05-13T16:33:00.001-07:00

Why is it so much easier to be distracted then to focus? Is that something we learn at a young age or is it already pre-programed into our DNA? I know I'm not the only person that finds it easier to check my email in the morning then to sit down and read my Bible or even read a book at all. I know my day goes better when I choose better, but I still don't choose better.
Hmm this is starting to sound like that verse in Romans. I don't do what I want to do...I do what I don't want to do...that one.
I suppose this is just one of those struggles all humans go through and will go through for the rest of our lives? Well, I don't like it.
Changing subjects...what I do like? The blue sky in Oregon. SERIOUSLY BLUE! I mean ... seriously. I'm not sure you could make a crayon that wonderful of a color. And against the blue sky rests the best green from the trees. I wish there were more adjectives to describe how it looks when the weather actually stays put for a few days. Everyone's moods lift and even the animals all seem happier. Of course the kids are all louder too. I don't suppose I mind that much if I stop to remember being a kid. I wasn't raised in an apartment either. More and more these days I am thankful for that. Thanks mom & dad!
Also another slightly random thought struck me yesterday that I wanted to write about.
My sister and I were talking about our 'jobs' and how difficult it is to maintain a schedule, how we sometimes feel badly wanting to spend money when we don't make money in the conventional way. That's when the thought popped into my head. My mom and dad (especially dad) worked HARD all through my childhood/early adulthood. My dad STILL works his butt off ALL the time! I'm proud that I have such hard working examples, but I find it odd that both his daughters chose to be self-employed...something he never really taught us. I do remember being told to go to college and get a good education so I can get a good job. I remember being told that having a good job was the only way to make good money. So why did we both decide to be pioneers for our families? Did we see something we didn't like about having to work for "the man" from 9-5 for the rest of our lives? I don't think my dad's work ethic is in question here at all. He did what he had to do and did it well and he still does it with consistent persistence. Even my husband does! His work ethic is like my father's. I don't get it...honestly. I tried for a LONG time to work a normal "corporate" 9-5. I did okay for a while, but I don't fit too well in that box. Although there are times on my journey as a pioneer for my family that I wonder and say "what if." Some days it does seem easier to just go get hired and work and work and work....but how happy would I be?
Yes happiness is fickle and in 2 seconds it can turn on you. But for as much as I watched my parents work as hard as they did I wonder now if they were happy. Did they pursue the dreams they had when they were in college? I think I remember my dad saying something about being a scientist...what happened to that dream? Or was it ever a dream? It breaks my heart that as a child I might have been the reason that necessity over threw dreams. I know we are told we must "grow up" some day, but I'm not sure I'm ok with giving up my desire to positively affect, influence, & change the lives of thousands of people. And not just with a few pills...I'm talking about letting flow the Love and Grace of Christ through my brokenness into those broken around me.
Today I love that I'm a pioneer. The sun is bright and the birds are singing as loud as they can. But there is a tickle in the back of my head. What if my dad had the right idea?
Then again ... what if I don't explore this path? What will I miss if I walk away from it? What will my family miss?

Devotional for yesterday and today

2010-05-07T10:30:00.000-07:00

"Do not search for security in the world you inhabit. You tend to make mental checklists of things you need to do in order to gain control of your life. If only you could check everything off your list, you could relax and be at peace. But the more you work to accomplish that goal, the more things crop up on your list. The harder you try, the more frustrated you become.
There is a better way to find security in this life. Instead of scrutinizing your checklist, focus your attention on My Presence with you. This continual contact with Me will keep you in My Peace. Moreover, I will help you sort out what is important and what is not, what needs to be done now and what does not. Fix your eyes not on what is seen (your circumstances) but on what is unseen (My Presence)."

"If you learn to trust Me - really trust Me - with your whole being, then nothing can seperate you from My Peace. Everything you endure can be put to good use by allowing it to train you in trusting Me. This is how you foil the works of evil, growing in grace through the very adversity that was meant to harm you. Joseph was a prime example of this divine reversal, declaring to his brothers: "You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good."
Do not fear what this day, or any day, may bring your way. Concentrate on trusting me and on doing what needs to be done. Relax in My Sovereignty, remembering that I go before you, as well as with you, into each day. Fear no evil, for I can bring good out of every situation you will ever encounter."

Who Are You?

2010-04-16T21:15:00.000-07:00

" "The chains of habit are generally too small to be felt until they are too strong to be broken." (Johnson) "If we would know who is the most degraded and wretched of human beings, look for a person who has practiced a vice for so long that he curses it and yet clings to it." (Brougham) It's within our power to change ourselves by changing our thoughts; by changing our thoughts we can change our actions, and by changing our actions we change our habits; but in each passing year of our lives, the "rewiring" process becomes increasingly difficult. Don't wait until the burden is so great and your desire so small that your only option is to remain as you are; if we remain as we are, we will then spend our remaining years with what little in the way of good results we have managed to gather around us. Remember, for things to change, we must change; for things to get better, we must get better. Start now!"

Write down your Goals

2010-04-12T08:43:00.000-07:00

"What does your personal list of goals look like? What's on it and how do the things you've written down make you feel? If, right now, all of those "wishes" were part of your reality, how would you feel then? Now, no doubt there are many people - even in the world of AdvoCare where we actively promote the process of establishing your goals - there are probably a hundred people who don't have such a list for every one who does. It's one of those mysteries of the mind as to how people can wish their circumstances were better, who pray for them to get better, who have a multitude of deep, emotional reasons for making things better, who devoutly profess to believe that if they "ask they will receive," but still haven't bothered to ask. My best guess is that those who don't have a written list of their goals are taking the position that they know what their goals are in their mind, and that's good enough; well, it isn't good enough. A wish in the mind is little more than an exercise in self-delusion; wishes in the mind are "fantasies," and the chances of attaining such undefined goals are virtually non-existent. I suppose another reason people don't have a "mental roadmap" of what they intend to have, what they intend to become, what they intend to feel, and what they intend accomplish is because they're so busy going to work to earn a living that they've ignored the vastly more important process of designing their life; and, designing your life is just what an architect does; he or she finishes on paper the building he or she is going to build even before the first shovel of dirt is dug up on the lot where the building will be. If you don't really know what you want, let me share a few things that, if they could "get it" and if they would learn to "give it" and then to "live it" would make life far more enjoyable for those who take a serious approach to "making things better." Being completely free of debt - the one freedom that makes all others possible. Becoming a stay at home parent. Not having to drop the children off at a day care center. Having enough money to live in a better place. Being able to spend more quality time with your family. Not having to come home mentally exhausted at the end of each work day. Being able to associate with people who think more positive thoughts. Driving a car that isn't mechanically unsound Having an investment plan that's going to make your future more stabile. I could actually come up with a much longer list, because all of us have an imagination that can provide us with hundreds of goals and wishes, just as we have the blessing of creative powers that could lead us toward the means of achieving those things our imagination presents to us. What the combination of a written goal list, along with our own imagination and creativity, can do to change how we live and how we feel about life and our future is rather incredible, and the barrier so many have learned to live with is that we've forgotten to "ask." And - what can a person who hasn't learned to ask expect to receive? About what they now have, because for things to change, we have to change. Don't be one of those who curse the effect but nourish the cause, and of whom it can be said, "They have not, because they ask not"." - Ron Reynolds

This morning's devotional

2010-04-06T12:17:00.000-07:00

"Bring Me the sacrifice of thanksgiving. Take nothing for granted, not even the rising of the sun. Before Satan tempted Eve in the Garden of Eden, thankfulness was as natural as breathing. Satan's temptation involved pointing Eve to the one thing that was forbidden her. The garden was filled with luscious, desirable fruits, but Eve focused on the one fruit she couldn't have rather than being thankful for the many good things freely available. This negative focus darkened her mind, and she succumbed to temptation.
When you focus on what you don't have or on situations that displease you, your mind also becomes darkened. You take for granted life, salvation, sunshine, flowers, and countless other gifts from Me. You look for what is wrong and refuse to enjoy life until that is 'fixed.'
When you approach Me with thanksgiving, the Light of My Presence pours onto you, transforming you through and through. Walk in the Light with Me by practicing the discipline of thanksgiving."

Process

2010-03-31T11:55:00.001-07:00

"'Getting better' is a lifetime project, for we have often spent so many of our years doing the things we should have left undone, and leaving undone the things that should have been done. And, since we attract what we are, and not just what we want, it makes sense to pay attention to what we've become." - Ron Reynolds

quote

2010-03-31T11:46:00.000-07:00

"- success in life is not so much about learning new skills or acquiring more knowledge, it's about recapturing some old emotions; the kind we all had when life had not yet taught us self-imposed limitations and to be content sitting inside a box of our own design. You have your own chance to change. What are you going to do? None of us have to remain how and where we are except by our own choice - or lack of choice. On any day you choose, you can begin a new journey, but to begin that bold, new journey, you must recapture the magic you once had; it's still inside of you - for now." Ron Reynolds

"Questioning Our Relevance"

2010-02-22T08:51:00.000-08:00

I know from time to time I share these. I know they're long. But honestly it will only take you 5 minutes and this one really is worth reading. Take a minute, will you?
****

One of the big questions for every one of us to ask ourselves from time to time is whether what we're doing and what we are is relevant.

Considering the people we know, work with, socialize with and associate with in other ways, and considering what goes on in our average day, is how we're spending our time and investing our skills going to have any significant impact?

On the surface, that may seem like an ambiguous and foolish question, but I think it's an important question; doesn't it make some degree of sense to want to spend our life in a way that leaves a mark in some positive way? Years ago, I bought into a philosophy that suggests that life and how we live it should be more than a birth certificate, a grave-marker, and about $1.6 million in consumed goods and services as the only evidence of our existence. And, on that grave-marker, what can be said of the "dash" between the year of our birth and the year of our death?

I have long held to the conviction that a job is a form of enslavement in which we work just hard enough to keep from getting fired and the boss pays us just enough to keep us from quitting. Now, having stated that, I realize that having a stabile source of income is necessary, but I also think we should pause on occasion to ask ourselves whether that source of income should be our only source of income, and whether the job should be accepted as a permanent condition.

For many people with a host of personal skills and virtues, a job is somewhat like putting a championship race horse in c ten-foot by ten-foot corral and leaving it there: the thoroughbred champion will, over time, lose its ability to run like the wind; it will lose its zeal to compete and to improve and advance the "gift" that it has. A set of skills and a level of ambition for using those skills will, if unused and with the passage of enough time, begin to diminish and will become eventually lost.

Now, a relevant activity for the championship thoroughbred would be to run every day so that its skills could be honed and refined. In the same manner, a human being with ambition, with imagination, with inherited and learned skills, and with the desire to become someone unique by using those virtues and gifts should seek out a place that enables him or her to increase their values by using those skills. Instead, millions of people settle for working an 8-hour, 5-day a week job where - instead of taking their skills to a new and higher level - they settle for doing their "job" as dictated by a corporate "job description sheet." True, by doing so we get our paycheck every two weeks that lets us pay our bills (or at least pay some of them), but at the risk of losing the human attributes that could have enabled us to do so much better in life, and to become so much more than the job allows us to become. Let me urge you today to take an "inventory" of your current circumstance; become more relevant by doing something that leads to a host of new freedoms and to enjoy a degree of personal and financial independence that is beyond what you may currently have. And finally, if you could do better, should you? Now there's a very relevant question the answer to which could launch you into a new orbit of achievement. Why not do something to make your "dash" highly relevant even long after you are gone?

Priorities

2010-01-14T12:07:00.001-08:00

I have recently been working through my priorities in my mind. I've been journaling a lot and thinking that I just might have a few priorities mixed up. I know for sure the things I put my time into are things I enjoy, but I am expecting to build my business into something will eventually run on it's own, earn me some "beach money," and make it so Francisco and I can be stay at home parents then I'd better figure out what I really need to be spending my time doing!
So, it's possible that my knitting will need to slow down. I am still in full swing of some projects I promised for people. I plan to finish these as soon as I can, but I am also planning on NOT spending every spare minute I have knitting. Although this is probably the most comfortable and easiest thing for me to do, I do know that will not be earning me the amount of wealth I desire.
Don't worry my few followers. There will still be knitting updates and pictures :) And you can still request things from me, but it must be said that I will be making a conscious effort to work my business more than knit. :) Over all I think this is a good thing!
I'm headed to Dallas, TX next weekend for our bi-annual success school! I'm so excited! I also have a friend coming with me for the first time! So of course this makes it double exciting! Andy Andrews AND Michael W. Smith will be there...seriously I'm like a kid before Christmas!!

Finished Another One

2010-01-05T21:41:00.001-08:00

I finished another hat! I used size 8 circular and double pointed needles with the same Vanna yarn I used for my pink hat (except this one is purple ... lol obviously). I made it for Francisco's cousin! I hope she likes it!
I frogged the scarf I was making for my sister and started over. The sides were being stupid....looking stupid...well not perfect. But it's super easy to work on at work so I caught up on it today and will continue working on it at work this week and I should hopefully be 1/2 way done by the end of this week (unless she gets me some more yarn then I might be able to finish)!
Still working on a lace scarf and a scarf to match my hat. That's all for now. More knitting to do!
Actually more bed time to do.... *yawn*

Over load

2009-12-30T13:58:00.001-08:00

Well, I went from having just 2 knitting projects I was working on to 4 on needles and 4 waiting to be started! LOL :) I think I love it, but I'm not sure my hands do!
I'm making another big squishy hat in purple for Francisco's cousin, Sarah. :) And I'm making my sister a nice warm wide dark gray/light gray marbled color scarf. I'm also making slow progress on a lacy scarf for my wonderful friend Michelle. This one is taking me a while though because the yarn is so itty-bitty! But it's fun to watch the lacy pattern appear.
Then I will be making 2 of my other friends (from church) simple beanies. And a secret project in the works (I know she reads the blog).
Just thought I'd drop by and give you an update! Back to work!! Or ... maybe I'll walk to Freddies and spend the last of my $ on some more double pointed needles. haha I'm addicted and it's perfect for not wanting to drive until the snow turns into permanent slush.
It's been a nice vacation :)

Dear Oregon Drivers

2009-12-29T15:26:00.000-08:00

When it's snowing don't be stupid. Look I get that some people have a great amount of experience driving in the snow, but don't assume we all do. And how about you leave a few car spaces between me and you? I don't really ever enjoy being tailgated, but seriously ... in the snow too? Also ... DON'T be on the phone!!!! /sigh
I don't mind driving in the snow. And I don't drive at 15 miles in hour unless I'm sliding ... but driving over the speed limit?? Ugh ...
Well, at least the snow is pretty!!!!

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-28T13:03:00.000-08:00

Look my hat is done! I started it on Saturday and finished it middle of the day on Sunday! It was a new pattern and I LOVE it! It's warm, soft, and squishy!! I would LOVE to knit more of these as presents or just cuz. It takes 2 skeins of yarn and if you buy the yarn I'll make it for you I used Vanna's Yarn (you can get it at Michaels) :)

I found a sale on the yarn at Michaels and bought some more of Vanna's yarn in this gray color! I can't wait to show you what I will be making from this yarn!! hehe

The yarn (above) here is from For Yarn's Sake! I got a gift certificate from the family I work for! It's amazing yarn and I'm super excited to use it!

This last picture is the yarn that my husband got me for Christmas! (plus the yarn that my hat was made out of) He also bought my size 8 circular needles and a set of size 3 double pointed needles so I can try my hand at socks. I'm super nervous about the socks though!

It was a really great Christmas. I had fun with my family! We played lots of Wii bowling and golf, ate lots, and watched Julie & Julia (pretty good movie). It was a really low key, but wonderful Christmas! And now I can't stop knitting!!! I'm soo hooked! :D

I finished it!

2009-12-26T18:15:00.000-08:00

I can finally post what I made for Francisco for Christmas!! He's in love with it and wears it OFTEN! hehehe
This was my very first hat ever! I am now making myself a hat! I will post when that is done!

Stocking

2009-12-24T07:10:00.000-08:00

My husband and I decided to open our Stockings this morning before he left for work, so we could have a bit of Christmas just the 2 of us. We're excited to have my dad down this evening and for the rest of the weekend (hopefully!). And then my sister and brother-in-law tomorrow afternoon for Christmas Veggie Chili! (haha I made that up, it's just easier to cook then a turkey and more vegetarian friendly!)
Look what Francisco found in his stocking!! He was so happy and warm and snuggly! He walks to the max train every morning and it's been SO COLD recently! I just wish I could have given it to him a week ago, but he wanted me to wait lol
We LOVE Christmas!!

Post by Ron Reynolds

2009-12-22T08:46:00.001-08:00

In spite of the best efforts of government and politicians to make everyone equal, it's inequality that prevails not just on earth, but throughout the universe as well.

Stay with me on this subject - I promise not to get too carried away with technical information, and my objective is to get to a point that will make sense and that will help you see and better understand some things that can help in understanding people and their role in helping you build your business.

The nearest "star" to planet earth is called Alpha Centauri; actually, it's the fourth brightest star in the sky, but it's not just one star, it's three, but to the naked eye, it appears to be just one. While it's the nearest star to earth - other than our own sun, which is a "star," -- it is about 4.3 light years away. To put that distance in perspective, a light year is the speed at which light travels, which is 186,000 miles per second. Think about that; if you were traveling at the speed of light, in one second, you would go 186,000 miles. If you were in a plane that could reach such a speed, at about 35,000 feet, you could go around the entire earth and pass over New York City about six times in one second!

Now, if you were traveling at the speed of light, it would take you 4.3 years to get to Alpha Centauri. Our own moon, by comparison, is a mere 236,000 miles away; when the astronautics went there, it took about three days to get there, traveling through space at about 17,000 miles per hour, not 186,000 miles per second.

By the standards of how large "space" and the universe are, the distance to the moon isn't very far at all. Since it's as close as it is, here's an interesting question; since the moon and earth are so very close, why is the moon so barren and lifeless, without any large quantities of water, and full of craters from space debris that have crashed into it over the eons, how do we explain our own planet - earth - having abundant water, warmth from the sun, and life and multiple forms of vegetation that has made it extraordinarily unique compared to the moon? We both are exposed to the same sun, we're pretty much in "the same place in the universe," and yet one flourishes and the other is a barren rock whose only purpose is to exert its gravitational influence upon our own planet and make the tides of our oceans rise and recede with perfect regularity. Why didn't the moon derive the same benefits as did earth, since we're both exposed to the same influences? Why didn't life arise on the moon over all those years just as the earth did? Scientists tell us that something collided with the earth millions of years ago, and the collision was so massive that the explosion caused earth to become consumed by fire, and a piece of the earth debris flew into space and began to spin around and that debris over millions of years cooled off as our earth finally did, and it became our moon. That means both earth and moon "cooled off" beginning at the same time, and yet life exists on earth in abundance and the moon is a rock.

Even space is not equal in how it makes one planet thrive and another is nothing. That?s the way it is with people; some do and some don't; some will and some won't, and any effort we make to have everything equal won't work. Look for those who dream big and who want their lives to get better so their life will flourish, and don't be unduly influenced by those who - in spite of their promises - seem to be content with being a moon.

Oregon Zoo Lights!

2009-12-21T17:07:00.000-08:00

I don't remember the last time I went to the zoo here in Portland. I've been told that I went when I was a little girl, but I don't really have any memory of it.
Well, I got to go yesterday with Francisco and some friends of ours! They have an annual pass and they get 2 free tickets every time they go! YAY! We didn't get to see many animals, because we got there around 4:30-ish and it was pouring down rain, but hey...we'll go in the spring when all the animals are out. :) I got to see a few monkeys, sea otter, sea lions, and mama elephant with her sleeping baby. Then we road on the train and viewed the zoo lights! YAY!! It was fun :) .... really wet, but fun!
I got a video of mama with her baby, but I can't post that up here. (the file is too large) But here's a little pic of the key chain I got! :)

Projects

2009-12-18T09:47:00.000-08:00

Well, I decided to pull out that cable scarf I was working on and try it again. I should have tried practicing Continental Knitting with something simplier so that when I tried the cable it would be neater. That's ok. I suppose I don't mind too much. Although when I have pulled out my projects in the past (to start over) they were never quite as complicated as this. So I must admit it did hurt a little more this time.
I decided to try a new stitch called "moss stitch." It's alternating Knit 1 and Purl 1. So you knit the purl stitches and purl the knit stitches. I am quite familiar with the knit and purl stitch so telling them apart is easy enough. Although it's taken me a while to do so. The video tutorial I watched suggested I cast-on an odd number of stitches onto my needle and just remember knit, purl, knit purl. It works!! I don't have a picture of it yet, but so far so good :) I'm liking the idea of using this stitch for a scarf, but I'm trying to find other ways that I can use it. I think it would be a fun boarder or cuff on a sweater. Or it might be a fun cuff on mits or gloves. I'm not sure though. I think it might also make a good hat brim.
When I finish it I will post a picture. And I will be once again posting progress pictures on my cable scarf (when I start it again).
I'm running out of yarn I enjoy....and people to give my projects too. I'm sort of toying with the idea of setting up an Etsy shop, but there are already SO many knitters out there selling their projects that I'm not sure my works measure up. So who knows. If you want something made (on the small side) all you have to do is buy the yarn and let me know. Or we can go together and get the yarn....I'd buy yarn for everyone, but I'm not quite at that place in my life yet.
I've been looking at a lot of sweater/cardigan patterns and trying to pick one I like...but also one that doesn't scare me lol! Eeee :) Is it Christmas yet??

Before and After

2009-12-16T20:06:00.000-08:00

Francisco helped me make this in a program called Pixelmator (kind of like Photoshop). I was looking through iPhoto and happened upon this photo, so I thought I would add the most recent one we had a friend take (with his iPhone :D ) at our AdvoFamily Christmas Party!! HOLY COW....who are these people??? :D
The image isn't that big so if you click on it you can get a better look and it shouldn't give you the blue screen of death :P lol

Are you settling?

2009-12-15T08:56:00.000-08:00

"Make sure you always know what the next goal and next dream is, and make it your life's work to always be found in pursuit of the next objective. Never forget that the power you once had to fashion and to achieve what you already have is the power you still have - unless you lose it by straying away from designing your future."

My First Cable Scarf

2009-12-14T17:12:00.000-08:00

My cookies were a huge hit!! I got a plate full of other cookies to try, so come on by if you'd like a cookie or two! hehe
I decided to try a new knitting pattern! Sometimes when I'm surfing the net I will peruse the knitting patterns from Lion Brand Yarn.com :)
I came across a simple and easy to read pattern for a very nice looking cable scarf. I decided to use the extra cream colored yarn I have.
So far ... it looks okay. Though since I am slightly obsessed with having my works be perfect I'm not sure if I should keep going or pull it out and start again. The sides are NOT even ... and there are bits of yarn sticking out all over.
Here's a couple pictures. Sorry their not the best. Can you see the cables?

This is the cable needle I used. I must say knitting on size 8 straight knitting needles and then transfering the stitches onto this teeny thing makes knitting off of it slightly difficult, but I'm managing. I need to figure out if I can use DPNs (double pointed needles) or if they make bigger metal cable needles.

Here are the final pictures of the finish wash clothes. These were also a HUGE hit :) D and S really appreciated them! It makes me want to make more of them! One snafu...tying up the ends wasn't exactly the smoothest. They ended up not looking as neat as I wanted, but then again I am a bit of a perfectionist about it. I got 6 good sized wash clothes from the 2 skeins of 100% cotton yarn. I think that was a good deal :) PLUS they're personalized!! I can't wait to see if Santa brings me sock yarn and sock needles!! tehehe

Chocolate Crinkle Cookies

2009-12-14T09:06:00.000-08:00

I made 3 dozen cookies for a cookie exchange today! Mmmm I've never made these before I would like to say I am pretty proud.
Here's a pic of the first batch that came out. (It's a messy job putting them together, so only a couple pictures were taken.)

MY FRIEND MOLLY

2009-12-12T08:50:00.000-08:00

Molly is having a give away and I had to share her blog. It's so crafty fun!

While I was crocheting...

2009-12-11T09:53:00.000-08:00

Often when I'm crocheting or knitting something I don't have to think about much (I memorized the pattern and the stitch is easy) I will watch hulu.com or the Friends episodes we have on DVD. Yesterday I was watching House and had the option to watch it commercial free if I "watched" (read ignore) a 1min30sec commercial. This commercial was about medicine for a certain sleeping pill. I've seen the commercial before, but this time I paid attention to the "warnings." Check this out...
Diarrhea; dizziness; drowsiness (including daytime drowsiness); "drugged" feeling; dry mouth; headache; nausea; nose or throat irritation; sluggishness; stomach upset. OR...(even better -.-) Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the hands, legs, mouth, face, lips, eyes, throat, or tongue; unusual hoarseness); abnormal thinking; behavior changes; chest pain; confusion; decreased coordination; difficulty swallowing or breathing; fainting; fast or irregular heartbeat; hallucinations; memory problems (eg, memory loss); mental or mood changes (eg, aggression, agitation, anxiety, depression); severe dizziness; shortness of breath; suicidal thoughts or actions; vision changes.

HOLY COW....Ummm I get that people can't sleep. And sometimes they need these things. (I suppose.) And if I'm not careful I might offend (not that there are a LOT of people that read this blog..), but YIKES. I find it scary how we (the US) readily swallow things that might give us side affects like this. I have before ... I'm sure you have before. I'm finding, though, that staying healthy in the first place is so much easier in the long run. When Francisco and I started using the AdvoCare products I don't think we really understood how MUCH more of a benefit it would be for us. Staying healthy from the inside out prevents us both from needing to consume mass amounts of these kinds of drugs. Don't get me wrong...I'm not saying that all drugs of this sort should be thrown out, but shouldn't we pay more attention to what we're taking and what it could do to us? Shouldn't we be worried when we take one pill then we have to take 2 more pills to counteract the first one and so on from there?
I pay attention more now then I used to. And it really is because of being involved in AdvoCare. I turn to their products (which have never had a negative affect on me) first before anything else. I understand that a mostly unknown product and company is difficult to trust, but why is it we so easily trust pills that could possibly harm us more than help us? I suppose the idea that a pill from your doctor could immediately "fix" the problem you're having is a huge draw. Francisco and I struggled when we first started. It was hard to stick with it when I didn't wake up and find myself a size 2. But we stuck with it over the year and Francisco lost 85lbs (from a size 44 to a 30) and I lost 12lbs and went from a size 16 to a size 8! We realized that the products we take work when we are consistent for longer than a week. We ask the people we work with to commit for 3 months, because everyone's body is different and sometimes it takes a while to fill in the holes and repair what ever has happened to the insides. It's difficult for our culture to grasp the idea that you have to be patient. AdvoCare isn't a microwave or an overnight miracle pill. It requires you to look at your life and how you treat yourself. Are you will to invest the time and resources to that? Will you begin to change what you eat? Will you try and take a walk more then once a week? If it meant climbing out of that energy slump or foggy feeling wouldn't you want to try? I know doing new things are scary, but sometimes you have to in order to change that path you're on that you dislike so much.
Something to think about. :)

Good News, Bad News

2009-12-10T15:43:00.001-08:00

Bad news first. Since I'm such a perfectionist when it comes to crafts I pulled out the finished wash cloth to redo it. I was looking more at the pattern and looking more at the one I finished and realized that it was oddly tapered. And I don't like it when my crocheting is crooked. I find it's actually more difficult to keep a straight edge on crochet works. I haven't edged anything yet though, so maybe that would make a difference.
This is an example of edging :) Cleans up nicely I'd say!
So I pulled out the finished work and started over following the pattern exactly (I had added 10 more stitches and actually didn't need to). This afternoon during Kaitlyn's nap I finished 2! :D I'm headed into my 3rd and have decided I like this hook size and will pull out the other wash cloth (different yarn) as well. Even though it's annoying that I do this (ALL THE TIME) I've found that this means I practice more, that things turn out much better, and that I'm happier. It's really a good thing in the long run.
So I will finish and weave in the ends on the blue wash clothes and post that up here. After that I will pull out and start over on the tan/green wash clothes. I'm excited!
Is Christmas here yet?

Tad Cold Out There Isn't It

2009-12-09T09:28:00.000-08:00

Okay it's cold if you haven't noticed.
ALSO...would like to point out that I've tried to post comments on 2 blogs (1 yesterday, 1 today) and I type my comment and then it never shows. Acts like I never actually tried to make a comment to begin with. This does not encourage me to continue.
EDIT: I can post a comment on my sister's blog, but not on Ryan's or Sarah's...I am annoyed.
Another note....the baby I watch (Kaitlyn) is getting into everything lol.... I suppose that's what they do at this age, eh?
And here is the last paragraph from the Mental Vitamin articles I read every morning (or try to) from Ron Reynolds. He works at AdvoCare Corp. and writes these every day. Not always pertaining to AdvoCare directly ... most days it can be used in conjunction with AdvoCare or not. Francisco and I have run into many people this last year that say they don't want to be involved in AdvoCare as a business. As much I believe it really is everyone's choice and it is all about life and God's timing...I also believe that many don't stop to think long enough about it. If we can push our thoughts outside the box just for a moment and dream just think of all the amazing things that would happen .... We are all on a path. Make sure you're on the one you really want to be on.
"...I want you to think upon the many choices we have for the money we may earn here, regardless of the amount. It can help a parent become a stay-at-home mom or dad rather than leaving children at a daycare center. It can allow for a business to be built from home. It can allow a family to pay a full tithe, or a greater tithe. It can lead to a family becoming free of debt - a condition in which the borrower is the "servant of the lender." And, it can lead to a deeper and more meaningful sense of well being as our confidence and self-esteem grows and strengthens. By engaging in a Plan B income source, we are revealing a determination to take back greater control over the self-chosen direction of our lives; it enables us to know what we do not now know, to feel as we do not now feel, and to learn as we have never before learned. We can even come to that point where we put aside our "employee mentality," and begin to use the skills and insights we have."

Like-y?

2009-12-08T13:06:00.001-08:00

Do we like-y the new layout? I'm testing this one. And I think I really like it, but I want to know what you think!

Here's the Pic

2009-12-07T18:07:00.001-08:00

Here is a close up of the crochet stitch I used for the wash cloth and then the second picture is a pic of the whole thing. I am hoping to make 2 more from this skein of yarn, but I might just only be able to get one more. It's possible I should have made it smaller, but in the end I'm glad for this size and I think my friends will be too.
The yarn is, once again, variegated and when it's crocheted horizontally it looks like I pulled off an amazing pattern. Tricky huh! I love how this turned out and as soon as I finish the one I'm working on that's a different color I will post that as well.
This simple pattern called for a hook size I didn't have (I just used my 00 and my H sizes). It turned out fine :) The stitch is a hdc (half double crochet) for the foundation row and then hdc in the back loop for the rest. This created something close to the rows that K2P2 creates in knitting! (more on that when I complete the scarf I have in mind for my sister!)
It's thick and 100% cotton! Maybe the word will get out and people will want these for presents? :) Haha here's hoping!

Oddly Enough

2009-12-07T09:13:00.000-08:00

I'm finding that the lack of "readers" on my blog really makes a difference in me wanting to post. I suppose I should start commenting on other people's blogs more often.

Look What I Found!

2009-12-05T16:08:00.001-08:00

A blog involving art and horses!! WAHOO!! Also :) I found it just in time to enter a contest!
Go see!

Here's the pic

2009-12-04T08:51:00.001-08:00

A bit of a better picture I suppose lol. Maybe I should stop taking them with my phone? tee hee hee
It ended up being about 6' long I think :) And I really enjoy it!
I've started on the dish cloths and I'm really excited to post those up here too!
Here's a good quote I read this morning from "21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership"
"If you want to be a leader, the good news is that you can do it. Everyone has the potential, but it isn't accomplished overnight. It requires perseverance. And you absolutely cannot ignore the Law of Process. Leadership doesn't develop in a day. It takes a lifetime."

Announcement!

2009-12-02T20:15:00.000-08:00

I suppose I should have made an announcement that I was changing up my blog a bit! I thought I would decorate the blog to be more Christmas-y (cuz I heart Christmas) and I also wanted to be able to share my passions ... AdvoCare, knitting, crocheting, and rambling on and on about whatever I need to for that day!
P.S. Thank my sister :) She inspires me!

All DONE!

2009-12-02T20:01:00.001-08:00

I finished the scarf and I'm trying to figure out if I want to wrap it or not. I had some extra yarn in the same color and I am currently practicing crocheting in the round ... :) It's possible I will try again with the pictures, but I'm a bit discouraged from the last time I tried. I think I need a new computer!
Also found some money to go get some 100% cotton yarn for some dish clothes I'm making for Dennette and Sarah. They requested I knit them off hand, but I found an amazing pattern and I really want to try and complete that. When I get the yarn I will try and take some pictures of that as well.

The Pics

2009-12-01T21:18:00.000-08:00

Here are the pictures from my current project :) (please pardon the awful quality of the pics ... since I am new at taking pics of my crafts I will have to find a better set up.)
The colors are much richer ... this will be a long thin scarf. One that can be wrapped a few times around the neck but still has enough tail to hit around the belly-button.

Back in the mode

2009-12-01T13:59:00.000-08:00

For some reason I've found great pleasure in teaching myself how to knit and crochet. At the moment I'm just using yarn that I got from Aunt (thank you!). But every time I go to Fred Meyer, JoAnns, or Michaels I have to go look at their yarn and dream about all the amazing things I can make! Also a new yarn store has opened up (next to Trader Joes and the FedEx/Kinkos on Beaverton/Hillsdale Hwy). It's called "For Yarns Sake" and they have a TON of specialty yarns and dyes and it's amazing to go in there! The yarns at the "big" stores are all popular brands and are made in bulk so they are priced as such (read cheaper). But at "For Yarns Sake" their yarn dyes are one in a million and beyond brilliant! So unfortunately for now, they are a bit much to run out and buy in bulk, but now I know it's there for when I get SOO good that people are begging to make them sweaters, socks, hats, mittens, gloves, and other wonderful things! I asked Santa to bring me some sock supplies, so if he brings me those then be prepared for updates and pictures! I love this new hobby ... and as far as some hobbys go I'd say this one is relatively inexpensive. Although, I could see it getting expensive if I allowed it. But I'm doing my best to finish projects and only work with what I have while saving up my monies to go out and buy some more!
I'm 1/2 way done with my second crocheted scarf. Unfortunately I didn't take any pictures of the first one, but I'm pretty sure my friend was happy with it! It was orange and black .. well about 2 inches of orange on each end and then the middle was black. I used only a single crochet stitch since it was my first time and I used a size K/10.5 crochet hook. I have a 00 and an H size as well, but the K is bigger and I enjoyed the single crochet stitch better with that size rather then others. The smaller the hook the tighter the stitch. And the yarn I am working with right now is a heavier weight (actually I think it's called worsted weight). So the smaller hooks sometimes can be trouble makers. :) No worries though I conquered it! I will post progress of the one I'm currently working on!

Happy Wednesday!

2009-11-25T07:03:00.001-08:00

New Ideas

2009-11-20T12:47:00.000-08:00

My sister gave me an idea about what to write about on my blog ... She said I should try writing about AdvoCare and that part of my life!
Good idea sister! :) I was going to start that right now, but I need to go clean up a baby who just urped on herself! haha Later! :)
**
Okay, I'm back!
Here's what I wanted to write about today. I read this book a few weeks ago and I think everyone should read this! It's called "Strengths Based Leadership" by Tom Rath and Barry Conchie
There's a test in the back that you take and it picks out your top 5 leadership strengths (out of 35). The research was all pulled together by those Gallup research people. They found that the leaders people follow all have one thing in common. They all know what their strength's are and they gather people around them to bolster their weaknesses. Each 34 of those themes are broken up into 4 different categories: Executing, Influencing, Relationship Building, Strategic Thinking.
Here are the 34 themes: achiever, activator, adaptability, analytical, arranger, belief, command, communication, competition, connectedness, consistency, context, deliberative, developer, discipline, empathy, focus, futuristic, harmony, ideation, includer, individualization, input, intellection, learner, maximizer, positivity, relator, responsibility, restorative, self-assurance, significance, strategic, woo.
I took the test! I'm just going to copy what I am! And then you can read what each one means or not :)
ME = 2 in Influencing: Woo, Communication; 3 in Relationship Building: Positivity, Developer, Empathy. (Empathy was my number 1)
Here's what they mean!
****
Woo
Instinctively, you sometimes enjoy surrounding yourself with companions rather than being
alone. Because of your strengths, you have a gift for spinning tales and weaving yarns. You
traditionally use stories to entertain people whom you have just met. They probably share
their own stories. Why? They are apt to feel very comfortable and safe in your presence. Chances are good that you might gravitate to activities that permit you to join specific teams.
Perhaps you figure out ways you can work or study with them. Driven by your talents, you
might welcome the opportunity to bond with others around a favorite pastime. Watching,
discussing, or debating the outcomes of athletic events may appeal to your sociable, talkative,
open, and fun-loving nature. Perhaps you are enthused whenever you have a chance to be
around people who share your interest in sports. It’s very likely that you probably tell jokes
and act out funny stories to involve newcomers as well as outsiders in discussions. One of
your joys is making strangers feel welcome and part of the group.

Positivity
It’s very likely that you might be content with your results when you can honestly say you are
producing as much as you can. Perhaps you maintain an optimistic outlook on life regardless
of the value some people place on your results. Driven by your talents, you may be regarded
by some people as a big-hearted person. Perhaps this is one way you transform strangers into
friends. Perhaps out of kindness you share your time, knowledge, or possessions with selected
individuals. By nature, you might feel best about yourself when you are honest and forthright.
Perhaps telling untruths or omitting important facts violates your personal code of ethics.
Instinctively, you may raise people’s awareness about what is correct, right, proper, or good
with your upbeat attitude about life. Because of your strengths, you are comfortable
complimenting individuals you know quite well. After discovering each one’s preferences,
you can tailor your recognition to fit the person and the situation. You tend to lavish praise on
people. You make sure what you say and do pleases rather than embarrasses them. You want
the experience to be a good one.

Developer
It’s very likely that you realize that sharing information, resources, talents, and even time
provides you with experiences to grow as a person and as a professional. Driven by your
talents, you support the people around you by acknowledging their outstanding
accomplishments and stellar performances. By nature, you occasionally inconvenience
yourself to help someone else. Maybe the person’s appreciation, smile, or words of thanks
make you feel good about yourself and life in general. Perhaps you have a bit more energy for
your own job or studies after you have done a good deed. Because of your strengths, you
have a special gift for helping people realize that you truly value them and hold them in high
regard. Instinctively, you capture others’ attention with your open and talkative style. You
support and inspire people. You boost their confidence and support their resolve to respond to
change, overcome obstacles, acquire new skills, gain knowledge, or reach lofty goals.

Empathy
Instinctively, you rely on your awareness of others’ feelings, thoughts, and needs to guide
you into and through partnerships. You consider various ways to initiate, nurture, and sustain
the linkages between individuals and groups. You bring people together. You help them
discover reasons to cooperate and support one another. It’s very likely that you might be
prompted by a natural impulse to answer questions, deal with perplexing issues, or overcome
obstacles. This need to do something arises from deep within yourself. Chances are good that
you sense when someone needs your assistance without the person having to tell you.
Because of your strengths, you occasionally give yourself credit for overcoming certain
problems or conquering specific obstacles. Maybe your ability to find solutions contributes to
your optimistic attitude. Sometimes you notice certain individuals who are easily defeated by
life’s challenges. You might try to help them cope with their difficulties. When you can
encourage people to take action, they might feel a little better about themselves and about life
in general. Driven by your talents, you may sense more strongly than others that sometimes it
is best to trust your instincts — that is, your gut feelings — when deciding how to resolve
issues, complaints, grievances, or puzzles.

Communication
By nature, you may be quite comfortable telling stories or describing your experiences.
People might look forward to hearing what you have to say. It’s very likely that you select the
right combination of words to convey your ideas or feelings. In the middle of discussions,
your vocabulary provides you with precise phrases and terminology. You probably express
yourself with ease and grace. Chances are good that you may gravitate to groups whose
members love to exchange information, ideas, opinions, stories, or jokes. Perhaps you have
an easy time sharing your thoughts and feelings with people. Driven by your talents, you
occasionally recount — that is, tell in detail — some of the stories you have read in
newspapers, books, magazines, research reports, correspondence, or public records. Maybe
the more you satisfy your desire to read, the more tales you have to tell. Perhaps few
activities delight you as much as evoking images in your listeners’ minds that bring forth
laughter and tears. Because of your strengths, you may be drawn to discussing issues and
ideas with others. Perhaps you avoid or excuse yourself from situations where one person
monopolizes the conversation.
(More to follow since this post is so long now!)

WOWIE

2009-11-20T12:44:00.000-08:00

FIRST: An Announcement!

THERE IS A YARN STORE IN BEAVERTON!!!!

Okay that had to be said :) I'm SOO excited!! It's called For Yarn's Sake....and I hope Francisco decides it should be a Christmas present! hehe

Since I said I would...

2009-11-18T08:25:00.001-08:00

Francisco and I had an amazing time in California. It was weird to be there ... it still felt like home. And yet Portland feels like home. We rented a car and every time we drove by our old apartment it felt like we were going home. When we went to our old church it felt like "our church" still. Ever have that feeling of being torn into? On my way home I was feeling super sad, because it felt like leaving home. Then again I was glad, because it felt like I was coming home. Of course I will say that breathing easier is always a good thing!
We got to spend time with our wonderful friends and their kiddos. Also got to see most of the people we wanted to see on Sunday. Though it was very difficult to only see them for 5 minutes on a Sunday morning. That's what I really did NOT like about living there. Everything was amped up to SUPER SPEED!!!! It's interesting to me, being so relationship driven, how so many people in my life aren't. I know in previous posts (long ago) I've talked of losing friends and not having other friends I try to contact ... contact me back. How much it really hurts me. Come to realize I'm wired that way. (To put relationships on a high priority.) Of course this still doesn't stop the hurt of dissolving friendships. I don't think my brain or heart will ever be able to understand why that happens. I suppose if I were still friends with everyone I wanted to be friends with my life would be fuller then I could manage, but my heart aches for that. All that to say ... California was great, but I didn't get to spend the time with every one that I wanted. Although I do believe I spent time with the people I was meant to spend time with. Doesn't make the ache go away though.
I don't miss living down there. But I do miss those people. I do miss the church.
OH and yes ... Francisco SHOCKED everyone. Well, okay so did I!! tehehehe no one recognized us! They did recognize the positive changes and energies coming off of us though....this is a good thing!
I'm so proud of Francisco :) Hmmm this post seems scattered. meh ... oh well :) I posted

Clarification

2009-11-11T20:32:00.000-08:00

I heard the pulsars' sounds on a show on the history channel that talked about the freaks in space (or something like that).
I'm not sure how they get the sound. I think it comes from radio waves (I'm pretty sure that's what they said on the show). They played a bunch of different ones on the show while they were talking about them.
Also the Bat For Lashes song has it at beginning of the "Two Planets" song ... or something that sounds like what I heard on the tv. (Does this help sister?:D )

The History Channel

2009-11-11T17:00:00.000-08:00

Okay so here's something I wasn't expecting to write about, but it kept coming up in my brain and even on the way home on Monday as I was listening to a song by Bat For Lashes I heard it again. The sound of a pulsar. And the more I learn about it the freakier it gets and the freaking cooler it gets! How come I didn't know about these?? (by the way I'm listening to the song as I write this post lol it's called "Two Planets" and I swear that they use a pulsar's sound in the song.)
Here's a video of the sound a pulsar makes.

You don't really need to watch the whole thing to get the idea, but oh my gosh!!! A pulsar is short for pulsing star.
(from http://imagine.gsfc.nasa.gov/docs/science/know_l1/pulsars.html)Simply put, pulsars are rotating neutron stars. And pulsars appear to pulse because they rotate!
They blink like a lighthouse would! And get this!! They all spin at different rates so they all have a different sound! Oh my gosh the more I learn about this the more I want to learn about it. The older I get the smarter I feel (or maybe it's more confidence), so I actually want to learn about these kinds of things!! So go learn about them ... and maybe watch the History Channel? :)
Also here's a Bat For Lashes song ... a favorite of mine (I couldn't find the other one)

A note to myself

2009-11-09T18:32:00.000-08:00

Since I'm no longer making lists I thought I would make a note to myself while these things were still in my brain.
The next few blog posts I'd like to write about: My trip to La Crescenta, the book Strengths Based Leadership, the book Failing Forward, what I've been learning about myself recently, and just a general topic of where my life is headed.
Oh good now I really hope that all the stuff floating around in my head right now can be put down in some nice posts rather then one really HUGE one.
Since I just got back from my trip I will be starting these blog posts tomorrow.

Support

2009-10-31T09:27:00.000-07:00

In support of my sister I am now going to try my hardest to be more active on goodreads.com
I hope that I can do this lol of course I don't chew through books like she does! I guess I don't think that I can add much to the "book world" because I don't read as much as fast. But I'm still going to try!

Pumpkins!!!!

2009-10-25T19:17:00.001-07:00

Fall

2009-10-22T16:11:00.001-07:00

I enjoy crunching and swishing the fall leaves around. Sometimes I wish I could pile them up and jump into them!
:) It's good to remember that's its ok to play!

In Which I Copy My Sister...

2009-10-20T21:23:00.001-07:00

A good one!

2009-10-20T08:46:00.000-07:00

Another post by Ron Reynolds!
**

Mental Vitamin - Missing The Point

Today at 5:10am

"We have paid off all our credit cards. We've paid off our cars and all our other loans, and we even own our own home - outright. We have no need to build a business, so I?ve concluded that AdvoCare isn't for me."

Those were the words of a woman I met recently, and she reached her conclusion because she and her husband had long ago concluded to do almost precisely what the DebtBuster system is designed to do. But she began her quest for financial independence before DebtBuster ever became a cornerstone in the AdvoCare concept for taking back control of one's life. Her conclusion may seem to make sense, except that there's a major difference between "seeming to make sense" and actually making sense. We must congratulate her for sticking to her resolve to free herself from the bondage of debt, but we should perhaps reserve our full congratulations, for there's an element that the woman at issue - and millions of Americans like her who are debt free - have clearly overlooked.

Simply being out of debt and able to enjoy most of what gives you pleasure without endangering your future security is part of what we should all pursue, but it's certainly not all we should pursue. If you were blessed in so many ways as the lady in my example is blessed, what would you do, assuming your life encountered the AdvoCare opportunity after you reached a full measure of financial security?

No doubt you have encountered people who - when you share your story with them - reject any notion that there's a place for them in AdvoCare. They have the big home, the stock portfolio, the money put away in several safe places, the cars, the clothes and all the other trinkets that connote success and happiness. They have "risen above it all" but they find themselves without a transcendent purpose. They float along on the cloud of their past, self-designed - and in most cases, deserved comforts. They assume that the acquisition of material and financial comfort is an expression of their value, and they choose to ignore how, by sharing what they have learned with others, they could make a significant contribution to the lives of others who have not yet managed to find such a cause and such a purpose.

Perhaps we should have a special position titled "Emissary Advisor" for those who have concluded they "don't need the money" and therefore don't need AdvoCare. I surely don't mean to suggest that we're going to actually do that, because those who "count themselves out" wouldn't respond to that approach either. We'll just do what we've always done; we'll find those who have come to enjoy success, we'll engage them into AdvoCare as a product user, and we'll let them be "introducers" without any special title. They can lead us to those among their circle of friends who are still searching and still struggling. Even the most affluent among us needs an on-going transcendent cause, for "without a vision, the people perish."

Hello

2009-10-15T14:31:00.000-07:00

I have time to write. But nothing is in my head.
I suppose having nothing swimming around in my brain is better then the anxiety ridden brain issues I was having at the beginning of the week. (here's the short version!)
Turns out what I thought was a healthy habit, writing lists, is actually a horrible obsessive habit that took control of me and my brain. NOT OK...by the way.
I had no idea how horribly chained to it I was. Writing down 20-30 things "TO DO" and then expecting myself to get them done within the next 2 days ... is ummm INSANE! I had it color coded and everything. Writing down all those things also fed into my anxiety so no wonder I had panic attacks almost every time I wrote one of those lists. Of course then looking at everything I had to get done really discouraged me, so I would cope and well, not do anything. That in turn created shame and then that turned into rage and poor Francisco got the brunt of all that! (so not fair)
Turns out I don't need a list of 20-30 things to be disciplined. WAHOOO!!! Even though I can feel the pressure in the back of my mind to "make a list" I have resisted for 2 days now. And for 2 days I've felt free ... and happy...and panic free!! I have my moments...but I give it back to the ultimate Warrior and let Him fight :D
So now I'm working on daily habits and disciplines. And separating work from home stuff. I write all my work stuff down on a white board in the office and let go of my worry about all of it. I am now learning to let go of control and just trusting more. Also ... needing to find a healthy balance of remembering to do the things I'm responsible for and letting go of trying to do everything perfect!

Me too!

2009-10-13T12:34:00.000-07:00

I wanted to follow my sister's amazing idea :) So I added a little background to my blog!
Since I'm working at the moment my brain really isn't focused enough to write the blog I want to write.
Was going to write about learning that my obsession for list making isn't really a healthy thing.

Not my own but amazing...

2009-10-08T11:21:00.000-07:00

This did not come from me. It was written by a man I greatly respect. I had to share it! :)
* - * - * - *

Mental Vitamin - Daring Mighty Things

Why should a person joining AdvoCare bother to get excited about having the chance to change the lives of others? Aren't we really about nutritional and sports performance products, and what those products can do to help others lose weight, look better, perform better and capture a better sense of well-being?

To really know the answer to that, you have to have been part of AdvoCare over its first half-dozen years. If you had been there, you would have heard Charlie Ragus - the Founder of AdvoCare - say on more than a few occasions, "We are really not a nutritional product company; we are a company that changes the lives of large numbers of people for the better who just happens to market nutritional and sports performance products."

Now, to put what we really are and what we really do in perspective, let me quote something spoken by Theodore Roosevelt on April 10, 1899; "Far better it is to do mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take ranks with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory or defeat." Roosevelt titled that particular speech "The Strenuous Life."

Roosevelt imbedded some other moving comments in that speech; "In the last analysis, a healthy state can exist only when the men and women who make it up lead clean, vigorous, healthy lives; when the children are so trained that they shall endeavor, not to shirk difficulties, but to overcome them; not to seek ease, but to know how to wrest triumph from toil and risk."

The calling to which you and I have responded is what I would call a "magnificent obsession" - or at least I think it could be and perhaps should be. But those gathering among us cannot all see the real "calling behind the calling." While some embrace the duty and the responsibility for finding people who are in search of hope and a chance to show what they can really do by engaging as a business builder, the majority of those who join us do so because of the products alone; they want the discount they can get by registering as a Distributor, and sharing the products with a few close friends and relatives who also need and want the products. That choice does not in any manner make those who "embrace the products first" any less valuable than those who choose to become a business builder, but it is the efforts of the business builder that is mostly consistent with the vision and purpose of AdvoCare as designed by the Founder. And, I can say without reservation that it is that same vision of "people building" that is the vision held by Richard and Sherry Wright.

Finally, let me urge you today to "dare to do mighty things" so that you can enjoy more of the "glorious triumphs." Yes, you will encounter failure, yes you will have many moments of disappointment, and yes you will discover the pain of becoming a leader; but better we should find and confront challenges than to "shirk difficulties." We have a nation to change, and we have a world to change; to do that, may we surrender ourselves to the calling we have and submit ourselves to the personal change that is so necessary for all other changes.

Remember, personal change is the one change that makes all other changes possible.
- Ron Reynolds

A fun video ... someday I shall have a horse like this!

2009-10-06T10:35:00.000-07:00

Enjoyed this...

2009-09-30T13:15:00.001-07:00

Blah blah bleck

2009-09-28T09:51:00.000-07:00

Why is it that when I have some amazing things to write on my blog I think of them only when I'm driving? Seriously the last 3 or 4 times I've thought of something to write have been while I was driving back home from work.
Of course trying sitting down now to try and think of something to write ... and there's nothing.
I could launch into a long post about the past ... and missing my friends. I've done that already. Well, I do miss my friends. It's on my heart a lot, but just feels like there really is not much for me to do about it. I find it slightly odd the transitional period I seem to always feel like I'm in the middle of. For example: Before I was married my friends were married and I didn't quite fit into that. Right after I got married my friends were all married for more then 10 years, so I didn't fit there either. Now we've been married a bit longer, but a lot of our married friends now have young children and we currently do not. Of course some day we will, but why is it always someday. Will it always be someday? Or will some day turn into today and then that day will again warrant another "someday." So, now we don't fit into the group of our friends that have the young kids. Though I do work in full-time child care watching a, now, 6 month old baby. I talk about her like she's mine own. Sometimes I find that odd. As though I'm back in high school trying desperately to fit in again by finding a subject I know a little about and dumping into conversations with the "experts" I'm trying to fit in with. Is life then just moments of "some days" and trying to find your niche? I suppose ... that it is. But I'm not sure I'm satisfied with that. That leaves me running around ... in a holding pattern ... waiting for some day ... or something.
Are we built to be satisfied with where we are? Or is the drive to push us forward there to do just that ... push us forward. Will we survive being just where we are...must we continue to surge or can we just pause...and rest. Of course if I pause and rest inevitably I'm left on pause and will forget how to press play again.
Is the drive to move forward given to us by God so we can move forward towards Him? And then once arriving then float around in His peace and grace? Haha Kind of a funny mental picture. I suppose the constant search for significance is built into us, but we spend our lives finding it things we can touch, taste, smell, see, and hear...instead of first diving into God's eternal identity for us. I would prefer to rest in His identity of me. I honestly think that. It's almost as though my body won't allow me to stay there. Either that or my brain is so mucked up with childhood pain and the enemies lies that I can't find rest in that one spot. The drive to move around and never really find rest sits higher in my mind then the one to sit in God's grace and stay put.
There are times where I really do not enjoy life being a marathon. I understand, I think, on a very basic level why it is such. But dragging one foot in front of the other, trying to stay on the path and remembering to keep going forward is really not easy ... or pain free.

Let Go and Find the Time

2009-08-29T11:31:00.000-07:00

Everyone should really find the time to go a little crazy and just move. You'd be surprised how great you feel.

Dallas, TX OR BUST!

2009-08-06T09:30:00.000-07:00

Francisco and I are off to Dallas, TX for the weekend. We leave early, early tomorrow morning and arrive around 4:30pm!
I'm really excited! I'm so happy Francisco is going with me this time! I've already been to one Success School (intense training for our business) and it changed my life in so many ways! Of course I'm sure that might sound odd to some and others may be skeptical, but you can't argue with the evidence...I mean if you've known me for a while and you haven't seen me or spent time with me recently then it's possible you need to :) Because I have changed in so many positive ways! I try not to use the word improve ... because that seems to say that before now I was a screwed up version of me. Of course up until just recently I probably would have said I was a screwed up version of who I should be. It's really all about God completing His good work in me. Well, haha, I'm not complete, but you get what I mean right? I still have my days. I still struggle often, but compared to a year ago ... 6 months ago...God has matured so much more of me.
Okay ... all this to say. I'm excited what this Success School will bring. Last February's school started a really big journey for me! And so far I have to say I'm really grateful for it! Though ... sometimes it strikes me as a bit odd that I'm really doing this networking home-based business. And if I really stopped to think it would make me giggle when I think of how excited and devoted Francisco is to building this! Wowie!! Who would have ever thought! haha But we're doing some amazing things! Advocare and the people involved with Advocare have really helped to improve the quality of our lives as indivuduals (have you seen Francisco lately? Hehe) as well as a married couple! heh I just thought, as I was typing this, that some people could really take this the wrong way. But I don't really care that much ... because if you know me, you know how genunine I try to be. And that, even though I do lie sometimes, I'm a really, really bad lier. :P
WOooHOOO Dallas here we come!!

Random Bookmarks

2009-08-05T11:27:00.000-07:00

I was searching through my many bookmarks wondering what I had saved. It had been a while.
And I enjoy this a LOT. I actually can't wait to have kids so I can do this!!!

A New Layout and such and such!

2009-08-04T21:21:00.000-07:00

Okay so I thought I'd spice things up a bit. It is possible that this might be a bit too difficult to read, but we'll see!
Also ... I have been pondering in recent days and weeks how I was like as a baby. Since my current job is taking care of a 4 and 1/2 month old baby girl I often wonder if I was as stubborn as she is sometimes. She's at a stage right now where she hates going to sleep ... even though I can tell when she yawns and rubs her poor little tired eyes that shes exhausted! I wish I could just tell her strong little arms and legs to stop moving around so much and let the baby go to sleep! She is very strong and is really, really good at putting both her right and her left hand to her mouth and back. But when her pacifier is in her mouth and her hand finds it then it's the end of the line! She'll get all comfy and just about to drift off to sleep and then BAM pulls the pacifier from her mouth and then glare at me and scream like it was me who did it! hehehe Silly girl I say! Don't do that anymore it makes you angry! But she doesn't quite understand that yet. I wonder if I did that. I wonder if all babies do that.
Of course I would really like to say I very, very much enjoy her 30minute power naps, because after those she usually grins like a Cheshire cat and giggles. How can you be upset at that?!! :D

Some Quotes to get me going!

2009-08-03T17:29:00.000-07:00

So here I am trying to continue posting.
Here are some quotes...

"I believe you always get what you focus on and put your energy into. I focused on aligning myself with opportunities that piad me passive income."

"Nothing great has ever been accomplished in a state of hesitation. Committed leaders can quickly and easily attract other leaders."

"Take time to master the fundamentals and then just go! Don't wait to have all your questions answered."

"People typically will only do business with people they trust."

"Your mind is a powerful computer. It controls how you feel and how you feel determines what you attract."

"Regardless of whether your thoughts are based on reality or not your feelings are real and your feelings determine what you attract."

"We attract what we think about. If you identify yourself as successful and really believe it, you'll begin to attract success."

"As you grow, your journey takes you into uncharted territory."

These are quotes I wrote down from a book called "Beach Money". It was a quick enjoyable read!

Friday Fun!

2009-07-31T06:32:00.000-07:00

Can you guess who this is??
hehe

Often

2009-07-29T10:01:00.000-07:00

I often come to my blog to check on other blogs that I've been following and I look at the OLD posts up on my blog and cringe just a little. Then I stop and think of something I could write ... but seemingly intelligent thoughts allude me as soon as I try to type something. It's rather annoying ... and I don't enjoy that I keep promising to write and then do nothing. I wish I had some big really COOL project like my brother-in-law (he's building a sail boat and writing about) to talk about. I guess I could pick some project of my own. I have been reading a lot of self-improvement books and really working on myself in a many different ways. I think about writing about that, but then I second guess myself and think no one that reads my blog would care...of course then I end up not writing anything and that just makes no one read my blog! hah! I'm such an over thinker. I have been, also, thinking that I can just put quotes that I enjoy in the books I read. It's possible I should just put whatever I want and not worry so much.
Here's a little story for you.
It's been hot....well that's an understatement. Needless to say my rats have NOT been doing well in the upstairs in the heat. I check on them and have had a fan on them for the last few days. Yesterday early evening I went to check up on them and saw that one of them (JubJub) had a really bad heat stroke. OH NOES!! I felt really badly. I ran some cool tub water and dumped them in and they LOVED it. Although they were cleaning the water off themselves and sort of scrambling to try and get out...I could tell they really did LOVE it! hehe They were bruxing and boggling all over the place! (those are noises and sounds they make when they're happy)
I put them all downstairs in very small travel cages, but I figured they could survive for a few days in those until it gets cooler.
Here's another note.
We're moving to apartment 1. It's just "up the hill" from our apartment in the same complex. It's a 2bed/2bath flat on the first floor. So it will be much cooler. We're loosing some square feet, but since there are still 2 beds and 2baths we still have room to grow, but we'll be saving $100/month! woohoo!!

Something slightly personal

2009-06-12T18:35:00.000-07:00

I love being married, but it's tough to receive empathy from a man when he never truly experiences the PMS emotional symptoms I have. It's truly unnerving to feel all this crap and to also feel, at the same time, that it's all out of my control. I have my days ... everyone does, but these past few days it feels way out of my control! And it's infuriating. Okay it's beyond infuriating.
Not many people I can get empathy from ... or maybe there is, but I'm really not able to receive it. Bleah I dunno. I just hope this goes away pretty darn soon!
I have no idea why I just posted this either.

Changing Habits ... or something like that.

2009-06-07T21:07:00.000-07:00

I've been flossing! Over the last 6 days I've flossed 4 times. This is a huge deal for me!

I've been trying really hard not to nom down on the not the bestest foods and leave all the veggies alone (in other words I prefer bread, chips, and pasta...whole grain of course...first before veggies). I've been trying really hard to eat more veggies!

I got up once this last week at 5:45am to hang out with Francisco. It's something he's asked me to do. I always ask him to stay up late (what I prefer). I plan on doing that more.

I also plan on actively going out and building my business.

I plan on reading a book and my Bible in the morning at least 5 days a week.

umm and a lot more?

Heading Towards Beach Money

2009-05-17T15:24:00.000-07:00

So ... sometimes it's hard to understand that if I live like no one else right now I will live like no one else later. I don't enjoy that money and buying things makes me feeling better. I don't enjoy that I feel a draw...and longing to go out and buy new things. To buy things for Francisco....I mean his clothes are FALLING off of him and I can't go out and buy him some old used shirts from Goodwill even. I don't like that I can't just quit work and go out up into the mountains and ride for hours around the trails up there. I don't like the ache I have when I think about doing these things. It hurts .... but I so easily forget that one of my student loans is currently below $900...I'm so close to paying off a student loan before I'm 30!!! How amazing is that to say out loud...to express. It really is amazing ... but the ache is still there paining me. How amazing is it that we are living off of Francisco's salary alone and still saving and paying off debt? Say that to people and you get shocked faces. I understand that it's not normal ... and I understand that it really is a good thing...what we're doing, but I still want to go out and buy some more stuff for me. I want to go on vacation. I want to have children. I want to adopt and foster ... I want my horse...my goats, a dog....I sound so selfish.
I miss my friends in Minnesota, the Midwest, on the East coast, down in California, up in Canada, Washington....I want to pick up and fly out to see them ... hug them, catch up ... reconnect...just become friends again. I feel stuck here ... I feel like it won't happen for me. It won't happen for us. My eyes get so stuck on my dirty feet plowing forward one foot at a time that I miss the scenery around me and I miss what's at the horizon ahead of me.
I know that one day I'll look up and BAM I'm right where I never thought I could be. Life is what I make it ... if I live in the past then my future will end up looking just like my past. If I like I have been for the last 5 years then the next 5 years will be exactly like the last 5 years. I understand I have to change in order to manipulate my future...Most days I feel like I am doing that. When I look at myself and where I am now compared to last august I'm amazed! Then I of course second guess myself and say nothing's changed...that just reminds me of everything I still have to work towards. Why is this year of my life the year of pondering the past 27 years of my life and wondering what I could have done to do it better. I mean I have another 27 years...or more...don't I? Isn't this something you do when you're in your midlife crisis??
Francisco and I are working towards beach money ... the ability to have passive income .... and to have wealth to pass onto our kids and our kids' kids. I get that most people don't think like that ...and that most around us are scepticle. This leaks out into my head and heart and poisons my yearning dreams. But my dream is bigger and badder then these poisons. I will not allow life, nor other people's lack of faith in me and what I'm doing take away my dream. Though .. some days ... it feels so heavy and useless to carry around. Why would I try ... I should I try??? I won't get there. I won't have that. I don't deserve these ideas ... these hopes.
But why not? Doesn't God want to bless His daughter? Doesn't He want to give me life abundantly? Why are we so quick to douse people's requests for lifetime wealth? (I'm not talking just money either fyi.)
I want it ... I ache for it ... but at the same corner of my heart I hear whispers of defeat and feel chains holding me down ... holding me back. How can I ache for something SO MUCH and at the same time throw it out and give it up??

I must say

2009-05-07T22:44:00.000-07:00

I must add that Francisco pushed live our new website and I have to brag about it!!!
www.thebetterbalance.com

I'd love to hear what you think of it? Of course positive feedback would be welcome! We're always into making sure it's comfy and viewable by everyone!!

I got tagged!

2009-05-07T16:56:00.000-07:00

I got tagged by my friend Molly .... a LONG time ago ... so I'm finally doing this.
**
8 Things I'm Looking Forward To...
1. Being debt free.
2. Summer weather.
3. Being a mommy.
4. Camping this summer with my sister and brother-in-law
5. Going to see Star Trek and X Men Origins
6. Seeing my friends that live out of state
7. My birthday!
8. Earning an incentive from Advocare!
8 Things I Did Yesterday...
1. Worked
2. Cried
3. Watched Treasure Hunter: Book of Secrets
4. Called many, many people re: the MDA
5. well ... I don't have any other things ....
6. I got up
7. I drank my breakfast shake!
8. I enjoyed my Spark
8 Things I Wish I Could Do...
1. Horse back riding
2. Buy a house
3. Own horses and goats
4. Dance
5. Teach ASL Linguistics
6. Train horses
7. Backpack for days in the mountains.
8. Swim

8 Shows I Enjoy...
1. Smallville
2. House
3. Lie to Me
4. Bones
5. Castle
6. Firefly (RIP)
7. Dollhouse
8. CSI NY
*****
Now I'm supposed to tag people!
So I shall tag:
Valerie
Francisco
Pat
If you wanna you can :)

Umm

2009-04-21T21:15:00.001-07:00

Uhh yea so I'm not posting very much am I?
Well, now isn't exactly the best time either. But I thought I'd add the little note that I do see the need to post more.
I'll get right on that ... tomorrow?
:P
Soooon....I hope!

Took A Walk

2009-03-26T17:11:00.000-07:00

I took a walk today, because the last few days haven't exactly been the best. Actually to be quite honest this week hasn't been the best week. I suppose I'm allowed to have those right? I know for a fact that my mind, heart, and thoughts have been getting a major overhaul these last 6 months or so, but that doesn't mean that it hasn't been challenging and tiring. Some times paddling away from death seems just too much work. It feels as though this week has been one of those weeks. I'm not sure why I'm making excuses.
Anyway ... I took a walk to the park today while listening to Patty Griffin (if you don't know about her music go look it up!). Since the weather today was really nice there were of course a lot of kids playing at the park and I found myself pondering the past 10 years of my life and actually missing my youth. Yes, laugh now if you must...I am probably still considered to be in my youth. I wouldn't argue that too much, but as I walked around the park I found myself missing my late teens and early twenties. Now I really don't think that I miss the heartaches and growing pains, because those were hard and I'm not sure I would really want to repeat those...and that's really not what I'm talking about. I'm talking more about the other stuff I suppose. I miss college. I miss the good parts of high school. I miss flirting with boys and being flirted back. I miss staying up late and eating pizza. I miss playing card games and just chatting until all hours of the morning just to have to get up at 8am the next morning. I miss my professors and my classes. I think sometimes I even miss the homework ... though not all of it! I miss traveling and hanging out in big groups of really close friends. In college I think, most of the time, I felt like I had a lot of really, really close friends. Having moved a few times in the last 10 years I've found it really hard to set roots down again and have that bunch of really close friends feeling around me. I think I felt that a bit at LCPC in La Crescenta, but the city and state never felt like home to me. Now that I'm back in Oregon I find myself wishing I were surrounded by all those people again. I try really hard to stay in contact or reconnect with so many of them, but most of us are married and have families....then of course most have jobs. And since I do not it's hard to fill my days with busy-ness. It used to be, "way back when," that it didn't matter really. It was more about spur of the moment random food eating money spending expeditions. Now, I have to do grown up things and today I find I miss being a "kid." (And you know what I mean :P ) A good handful of my friends are older then I am and I really don't mind that, but part of me feels caught between "college age" and adulthood. Kind of the same feeling I had when I was in my mid teens...caught between wanting to be a child and knowing I have to "grow up." I don't know if I really enjoy feeling like this again. I suppose as we pass through different stages in our lives it really is just growing up. And I don't think I mind being a grownup most days, but today really is a day I wish I could just transport myself back to NCU or "Western" and spend time with those people that touched my life in so many ways...reignite those friendships...find the friends I've lost...(I miss you Benjamin ... more then you'll ever know.)...eat what I want to eat...spend the money I want to spend...I know some of these things aren't exactly wise, but I don't think I want to be wise today. Of course the mark of growing up is chosing to be wise when you don't want to. So I do the dishes, the laundry, I pick up the house, I refrain from spending the money, and I eat what I need to.
Spring is here yet again and I'm wondering, yet again, where am I going? What am I doing? What am I here for? Aren't I meant for something more? And if I am how do I find it? You know, honestly I want nothing more then to ride horseback through the forest. I think I'd enjoy doing it alone as well as enjoy doing it with my dearest ones.
I wonder often if I am meant to feel content and "rooted" in this life. I wonder if my soul will always feel called to a higher purpose, a bigger place, towards the time between times...towards lands, places, and people I know nothing of.
I know I want certain things and I also know I have to give up a lot in order to get those things. Or maybe not even give up ... more like wait ... A LOT.
I miss my friends. I miss life the way it was (some of it). I miss a lot of things back then. I know you're not supposed to live in the past...maybe in the morning I won't wake up and feel sad that I have to go through another day feeling like I'm missing something.
Well...spring is here ... I enjoy spring in Oregon. I always have. Spring is new beginnings.
I want that.

Here I am again!

2009-03-13T12:20:00.000-07:00

haha I haven't made time to write here ... in a while. But hey I think about it all the time!! lol That doesn't help does it?
Well, Francisco and I are still shrinking! The scale variates a little, but not too much. It looks like I am below 180lbs! And Francisco is almost below the 200lbs mark! Waaahooo! We got a gift card from rent.com and went and bought some new clothes for Francisco! I'm so proud of him! He's wearing a size 36 now :D (Down from a 44 or a 42 I think.) Which is AMAZING! I got to shop in the size 10 area .... *giggle* this makes me extremely happy! I can't remember the last time I was a size 10! I'm almost a size 8. And the last time I remember being a size 8 was 8th grade. Wowie!!!
I find it rather interesting, though, that even though I am shopping in the size 10s and even though as I type this I am wearing a size 10 (comfortable by the way too .. not too tight)...when I look in the mirror or even when I look down at myself I still see size 16/14 Kristy and not this new Kristy. I know that people notice when they see me and I can see a difference in pictures, but the mirror and my eyes still see me at a much larger size. It's odd to me that my brain can tell me that I am not a size 16/14 I am a size 10 and almost a size 8. It's logical, but, like I said, I still see my bigger body. I have to force myself to believe that I"m not her anymore. I guess it's also an almost "too good to be true" thought that I'm shrinking since for so long I wasn't. It's also VERY true that a lot of our weight and self image problems as women really sink into our heads/hearts and stick to us. So I could keep shrinking and eventually be a size smaller then an 8, but still see my bigger self in my minds eye and in the mirrors. This has caused me to realize that I need to keep plugging away at reshaping who I am on the inside as I reshape who I am on the outside.
I've been working on getting out of my apartment and going to places where I will meet new people. This has been a HUGE stretch for me, but still a really good thing. I'm still looking for my aces.
I am still looking for supplemental income. I've given myself the challenge to ramp it up into high gear again, but I find that idea scary. I know this may not make sense to most of you, but it's really been a fear of mine for many, many years. I don't know why looking for a job scares me so much, but it does. Of course if I don't look I won't find it and I won't meet any new people which stumps the job I really do enjoy!
Francisco just found out that he's getting an 8% pay cut and then after that his company may have to lay people off. Of course I really do believe that he will get to stay, because they NEED HIM! The pay cut we can handle. God has blessed us with so much. And He will continue to do so. I am praying hard though that He will continue to bless us SO much that we will soon not have to live just getting by. That we can start paying off our debts.
I really, REALLY want a baby. In fact more often then not it's an ache. I totally understand that in comparison to many woman I have not had to wait that long, but man oh man....I do not enjoy not being able to fill the ache of having a child. I am not even going to begin to try and think I understand what it must feel like to wait for YEARS to have a baby. I do, however, NOT enjoy people basically telling me I do have the YEARS to wait. I get that I'm young enough to wait a while and physically it will still be ok. But I don't really want to be 60 when my kids are all 18 and over. Of course since mine and Francisco's health is now increasing and declining I suppose it wouldn't be an awful thing, but ... ya know what I mean.
But as much as I want a baby I want to be responsible. And that means paying off a chunk of our debt and having something in savings so that we can at least afford to feed our child. Or maybe even diaper them? I understand I will never feel as though I have "enough" ... then again I think this is a mental mindset and "enough" for Americans is actually surplus to the rest of the world. I do also think insurance is important. So until we are making enough supplemental income to get insurance for me, I will not be adding a child to our world. I really do want to be a responsible parent. :) I know there are those of you out there that agree with me.
BUT do know ... that I DO want a baby. And I ache to have a child. AND ... you will all know when it I am preganant...so maybe don't ask anymore?
Okay it's lunch time. Loves!

Scales

2009-02-17T12:10:00.001-08:00

I stepped on our scale this morning and it read 179.8 ... I'm scared to believe it. Okay let's back up and say a year ago the scale said about 190. And round about June-ish it was stuck between 188-186. I started on products and lost over 20" but the scale has stayed roughly around 184/186. Of course I usually weigh myself at the end of the day and at the gym. Their scale is on carpet which I hear is not exactly accurate. And how accurate can gym scales be really? So I weighed myself this morning...just curious I guess. I was still in my PJs and it was a.m. and the scale said 179.8. I want so much to jump around like a freak and be excited...except that in a couple hours or even just tomorrow the same scale at the same time of day could read 182. I know that scales aren't the ultimate rule over this losing weight and being healthier thing...but a LOT of people focus on the weight part of it.
Let's talk about how I've dropped from a size 14 to a size 10. That's over 20" all over! My bra no longer fits either! So I suppose I'm a bit frustrated that the scale is hardly moving ... because so many people focus on that. BUT I also suppose that if I'm consistantly losing inches and not weight then I'm gaining muscles. So that means if you give me a hard time about not losing weight then I can beat you up?? :P
I'm not done yet :) I'm still headed down and that's all that matters. It really is slow and steady for me, but as long as I get there I guess I don't mind too much!
Francisco is melting before my eyes! lol he's so close to getting below 200lbs! I'm so excited for him! (Cheer him on!!!)

A week

2009-02-13T15:41:00.000-08:00

Well I just finished a week of being an instant mother of 3 kids (11, 9, and 7), 3 cats, and a dog. It was an interesting experience. I did conquer getting up at 6am every morning! A couple of them I even got up at 5am. OMG ... I think I just passed out remembering that. lol It's hard to be "mom" when I'm not really mom. Of course Dennette and Barry's kids are really amazing kids. I still can't believe how many dishes they produce rofl.
I'm tired....that's for sure. I cooked dinner for them every night too! Even though it gave me a taste of being a momma ... I didn't mind it. Although I'm not sure I'm ready to give up sleeping in ... >.> <.< nah I think I am. I'm trusting that it will be easier when I have my own kiddos. I think that I will definately end up being even more EXHAUSTED though lol
Well, still no babies .... plan was to start trying this month. But I still don't have a job and so we're barely scraping by. Which SUCKS!!! A lot. *sigh* I can't think about it too much ...
Another thought on all that is that Francisco is losing SO MUCH weight. He's looking amazing! I'm so proud of him!
I'm tired.

Hello again

2009-02-03T10:21:00.000-08:00

Here I am again realizing I need to post again, but at the moment I really don't have much to say. I mean, sure if I thought about it for a while I might be able to come up with a lot, but I would really rather go take a shower and get ready for my day. :)
Still no job, but I'm not really sitting under my black rain cloud any more. I've been working hard mentally and physically to make sure I make the choice not to sit under it. I'm still frustrated about the no job thing, but realize that we're ok and God is providing. I just wish I knew the plan. Okay ... I must be off.

A bit more difficult

2009-01-22T19:10:00.000-08:00

Well, it's becoming a bit more difficult for me to convince myself to post more often. I suppose it's probably because I feel like I have a TON Of stuff going on and I wish I knew someone that could ... or would give me answers and at the same time I understand that at this moment in my life I don't think anyone can. I really, REALLY do NOT get why God is like that in my life so often.
In an effort to keep our electric bill down (last month it was over $100) we turned the heat way down and tried really hard to keep the lights off etc. We just got the bill ... it was $15 more than the last bill. WTF??! I'm calling them tomorrow.
I did NOT get the job at Farmers. And again may I type WTF???? I don't know what God is doing. It feels similar to when we were first married and I couldn't get a job. I also feel like He's holding onto a brilliant job out there for me and just asking me to wait and trust. Well, I've never been good at that. And when life is SOOOOO difficult to live without money ... well that just makes the waiting and the trusting even more difficult.
I want to go back to school. Francisco says I can't until we have the money.
I want to have a baby. Francisco says we can't until we have the money.
I get it. I understand logcially what he's saying. And I suppose I can try and see where he's coming from .. being a guy and all. BUT what I don't get is my desire is there. (To go back to school AND to have a baby.) So if my desire is there ... then part of me feels God put it there. Of course it might just be .. well .. me. Okay, so if God put it there, then ... He's asking me to wait? FOR WHAT!!!!????? Seriously .... what am I waiting for?? More money???????? That is really, REALLY not getting us anywhere.
You know if I went back to school and got my teaching license...at least I would have a better chance at getting a job. But that's 16months away. (If I start in the summer.)
I'm frustrated. My faith is thin. My trust is thin. My heart and my head feel mushy and all scrambled up. No one has answers for me. My husband and I are both hurting and confused in different ways and generally that only serves to divide us. The stress is high. The worry is high. My depression, hormonal imbalances, and/or mood swings rage on...and there are no answers. I find then the guilt swings in and adds to the pile. The guilt of knowing I have it better than others....then of course that makes my problems seems invalid. *sigh*
I hope Intel keeps their CDI employees, because of Francisco loses his job too? We're going to be in Deep Shit. Oh God help us .... all.

A meandering thought

2009-01-12T17:23:00.000-08:00

Okay ... I know this might be weird to some of you out there who read my blog. And I have a feeling a few of you would really want to convince me other wise. And I understand where you're coming from. And I honestly don't think there's much to worry about. So all that said...some days...I wish I could really be her. I wish I had the body...I wish I had the confidence. I've always felt like part of me deep down inside is that character up there in the picture, but I've always been too scared of what people would think or what people would do if they saw that side of me or even knew about it. Of course now that I've blogged about it ... people know. EEK! Shall I expect ridicule now?? I hope not. I'm not saying I'm going to suddenly go crazy and walk away from the person you know now. I understand that character up there isn't really me. But part of me wishes I had the body, the mind, the personality, the courage to be her. Is it grass is always greener on the otherside sort of thing? I feel like my life might just be a bit easier if I really, truely ... 100% didn't care. Then again...are there really that many people out there...that many woman out there that really don't care 100%?
Hmmm So now you know.

Job Hunting

2009-01-08T15:00:00.000-08:00

I'm still job hunting. It's discouraging, but my sister has been of great encouragement and help. I almost got scammed, but thankfully listened to my gut. (And Val's hah)
I applied for a job at Farmers! It sounds like a job I could actually do :D Which is of course a positive thing.

Pics of Scarfs

2009-01-05T17:25:00.000-08:00

They're made out of different kinds of yarns and I really enjoyed making them! I'm stuck on one though. I can't figure out how to do stripes....so I was trying another way and it's not looking so good. :/ oh wells.

Knitting FREAK!

2008-12-31T15:58:00.000-08:00

Okay so ... Micheal's was having a sale on yarn and I got it in my head to make a few more Christmas presents. (Plus I had a 50% off coupon!) I got great deals on 10 skeins of yarn! W0000000T! I know it's a bit crazy that I'm going crazy over yarn. I got 2 different kinds of yarn that I had never worked with before and discovered I can knit with those kinds as well! Are you ready for the tally??

I've finished 4 scarfs in 3 days. :D AAAND they're good too. One though I didn't anticipate the yarn knitting so short, but it still worked out. I'm only using a knit stitch so it isn't hard. The biggest challenge is the different kinds of yarn I'm working with. I will post pics once they're all done!
I'm so proud of myself!! Now if only I could get a job. *sigh*

Bye Bye

2008-12-27T21:26:00.000-08:00

Spencer's real mommy and daddy came to get him tonight. And it was a quick trip and a really quick good bye. He seemed to be happy to see Barry and I think that makes me happy. But I did cry and I'm still trying to hold back the tears. I got really, really, REALLY attached to him. It's seriously hard to let him go home. Pray hard I get a job or else my sanity will be lost.

LINK IT

2008-12-24T11:41:00.001-08:00

I put up a new link that's our Christmas Newsletter...:) have fun

BLECK

2008-12-24T11:21:00.000-08:00

Look I enjoy the snow, but we're not in the midwest...if we were in the midwest it would be a totally different story. Because people there understand how to work with and around the snow. Here??? No way man. And I'm getting SICK of it. I wish everyone and everything (including me) could function in this kind of snow. AHHHHHHHH

Is this cabin fever???

Snow snow snow and some more snow

2008-12-22T18:50:00.001-08:00

Can you tell the difference between the roof and the ground? lol It's SO MUCH SNOW!

Spencer likes to go out for walks still, but I'm not sure he knows it's snowing. He's still looking for those darn squirrels that got away! "Grrrrrr ... I'm gonna get 'em!"

These aren't in the right order, but this is our snowman on Monday mid morning. Oh no he's drowning!!!!

Cute little snow dood. The snow was so dry we had to sort of pile it up.

Say hello Mr. Snow Dood!

Back to Zero

2008-12-19T15:59:00.000-08:00

I didn't get that job I was hoping for. I guess I shouldn't have put my eggs in one basket. I mean duh right? Of course I haven't gotten much of anything else offered to me at all. Oh wait scratch that. I haven't had ANYTHING offered to me.
I feel like I was finally making headway and now nothing...I feel like I'm back to zero. I feel like I'm fading away. I feel like I'm losing touch with everyone around me. I feel locked up and if it keeps up like this I just might feel crazy.
Sure I'm not supposed to feel this. But I'm drowning in it. I feel so heavy.

What I've been doing...

2008-12-18T20:14:00.001-08:00

This is the scarf I made today! I used 19gauge needles and the yarn my sister got for me!!! I just finished it! Here's a couple pictures of it! It's so soft and squoooshy!

This is the scarf I just finished for my sister! This one took me a LOT longer, because I used size 8 needles this time. That means a lot longer! But it's the same stitch. Looks a lot different huh!! I love them both :D I can't wait to give it to her!

Some Pictures for your Enjoyment

2008-12-16T17:09:00.001-08:00

Spencer didn't Not like the snow, but I'm not sure he understood anything else was different. He didn't seem to mind the cold that's for sure!

Snow snow snow!

I think he's trying to be sad, but I have no idea. Maybe he just wanted cheese :P

My attempt to try and show how much snow had fallen.

"ummm, can we go??? Stupid pictures!"

Bus Adventures!

2008-12-16T17:00:00.001-08:00

I had a second interview today at the MDA (Muscular Dystrophy Association) in downtown Portland at 12noon. I decided I did not want to try and drive out there seeing as 1/2 the roads are covered in ice and the other half are fine. I just didn't want to chance it. So I decided to try taking the buses. I knew those things had chains and that means I didn't have to pay for chains I just had to pay for the bus ticket.
So I went out and caught the 62 to Washington Square Transit Center. Then I caught the 43 to Taylors Ferry/Portland. I rode that one to a stop that was near Macadam and walked the rest of the way. On the way back I had to wait about 45minutes and buses with chains on them are SUPER loud, but other then that I had a pretty good experience. The bus drivers, overall, were nice and helpful.
Although I did spend from 10:15am until 2:45pm out. I think I like traveling by bus, but it takes a LOT longer. Maybe that has to do with the weather.
I've been reading another Jodi Picoult book and I have an erie feeling that I've read this one before. It's called Second Glance and as soon as I hit the 3rd page I had this weird feeling that I knew what was going to happen next and that I'd read this all before. That makes for continuing to read the book a bit more difficult. Although a little part of me wants to continue reading just to make sure I haven't read it, most of me does not want to continue. But I can't think of when or where I read the book. I thought I had not read any of her books. So .... it's odd. And I'm not sure what to do....keep reading? Or start the one my sister lent me. hmmmm
It's still cold. And I think it's going to snow again. Eeek! I guess I don't mind too much, but driving anywhere alone is too scary for me. Except we're running out of food... >.> <.<