(posted by Kristy)
Francisco just informed me that he called and reserved the church for January 28, 2006 at 2:00pm! YAAY! It's even more offical now!
So now he told me that he has to call the wedding coordinator to find out how much we have to pay to use the space. (Yes, we have to pay...ewww oh well, the church is beautiful and worth it. Hopefully it won't be too much since he goes there full-time.)
It's strange to me how much getting married is really starting to sink in. I mean we started talking about it in generalities a while ago. And then the conversations gradually became more serious and now I have a ring and a fiance. It was amazing when I got engaged, frustrating the week after (not many friends around to celebrate with), and now it's exciting and I'm glad to find things to fill up the next 158 days. (Maybe I should be counting in months until at least three months before...that sounds like so many days.) What's even stranger is seeing myself in a wedding dress. The strangest part? I look almost identical to my mother. I think she would have cried. I think there will be a lot of tears for our mothers over the next few months and into our future together. I feel like a princess and a woman. My bridesmaid, Jazzy, told me yesterday that I'm going to make a wonderful wife. I asked her why and she said because you are. She explained it a little more as she watched me pick up the living room (we were being artsy together) and put things away. We had a good laugh about it and about how much I have changed even in the last 11 months.
I am also excited about marrage in the fact that I know it will force me and Francisco to mature even more. I don't like growing or maturing sometimes because it hurts (ie: my mom's death), but I enjoy the outcome. Three years later looking back and understanding why God chose what in HIS timing.
I think another thing I'm really excited about (and I know I'm not alone in this) is not having to say good-bye and wait 5 days or more to see Francisco. I really hate having to leave him. Since we live so far apart (and yes 70 miles is like 2000 to us) we feel our time is so precious. So it seems to go by so so fast. Oh well, if I waited a life time I suppose I can wait a little while longer.
Francisco and I are both hoping to include something of our mothers into our wedding ceremony. I'm not exactly sure what yet, but ... there's still time.
I remember thinking a few months after my mom died and even last year, that it was going to suck when I finally did get married because she wouldn't be there. I never thought I'd marry someone with the same affliction/shared experience. And as I get to know Francisco more and more I know that me and his mom would have gotten along famously. As well as my mom and his mom. They would have enjoyed being related. It seems funny to me that I thought it would be many years before God deemed it my time to be married. But look...here it is 3 years and 22 days after my mom died and I'm getting married. I'm still young (24) and so full of humilty at the thoughts of my despair and inability to trust that God really would work this out.
So look here...I just wrote a book. Hope you enjoy. And hopefully we'll be able to keep this up.